CRUCIFIX - Cocaine lyrics

When I was a child I used to
Dream of what life would be
Like when I grew up i never
Dreamed it would be like this

Somewhere along the way I lost myself
Can you see me? Somewhere
Between my dreams and
Hell I've given up everything I believed in
But I had a name once
And now I'm someone that no one knows
I had a life once
But this ain't the life I chose
Now I'm empty
Drowning myself in my pain and nothing can
Fill me but this addiction for cocaine

Just one more time and I
Can leave this life behind
Now once again I'm stuck between a
Rock and a hard place, this hell I call home
It's got me lookin' like a madman
Tryin' to understand this lust for substance
That burns in my bones
Suicide on a daily basis, I'm too high
To face this pointless
Helpless, hopeless, heartless
God forsaken life I've wasted
Could you even fathom what it's
Like to be broken
Steady lookin' for a reason for breathing
Except this evil you're smoking?
And I never get a moment of peace
I'm living to feed the need for me to
Get geeked 'cause I can't eat and I
Can't sleep and I can't think what it is
I do and what I don't believe

I don't see how something so small
Could take control of me
I've given up everything I've loved
Everything I've owned and now
There's nothing left
But this skin hanging from my bones
I don't know how something so small could
Rip the life out of my soul
I know that I must be blind
But it's taking over my mind
All I want to do is hit
It just one more time and
I'll be find with this pain that
I feel when I'm lonely
I'm lonely, it's got my mind
Gone, my mind blown
Now I'm gone praying for Jesus
To take me home because I had a God once
But this ain't' the God I chose
Now I'm empty
Drowning myself in my pain and nothing can
Fill me but this addiction for cocaine