NF, Fleurie - Mansion lyrics

Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
Slept in broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion

Yo, my mind is a house with walls
Covered in lyrics
They're all over the place
There's songs in the mirrors
Written all over the floors
All over the chairs
And you get the uncut version of
Life when I go downstairs
That's where I write when I'm in a
Bad place and need to release
And let out the version of
NF you don't wanna see
I put holes in the walls with both
Of my fists 'til they bleed
You might get a glimpse of how I
Cope with all this anger in me
Physically abused
Now that's the room that I don't wanna be in
That picture ain't blurry at all
I just don't wanna see it
And these walls ain't blank
I just think I don't wanna see 'em
But why not? I'm in here
So I might as well read 'em
I gotta thank you for this
Anger that I carry around
Wish I could take a match and burn
This whole room to the ground
Matter of fact
I think I'ma burn this room right now
Somehow, this memory, for some reason
Just won't burn down
You used to put me in the corner
So you could see the fear in my eyes
Then took me downstairs and beat me
Till I screamed and I cried
Congratulations, you'll always have a
Room in my mind but, I'ma keep the door shut
And lock the lyrics inside

Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
And slept in
Broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Inside this mansion

Yo, my mind is a house with walls
Covered in pain
See, my problem is, I don't fix things
I just try to repaint
Cover 'em up, like it never happened, say
"I wish I could change"
Are you confused? Come upstairs and I'll
Show you what I mean
This room's full of regrets, it
Just keeps getting fuller, it seems
The moment I walk into it's the
Same moment that I wanna leave
I get sick to my stomach every
Time I look at these things
But, it's hard to look past when this
Is the room where I sleep i look around
One of the worst things I
Wrote on these walls
Was the moment I realized that
I was losing my mom
One of the first things I wrote was
"I wish I woulda called"
But, I should just stop now
We ain't got enough room in this song
And I regret the fact that I struggled
Trying to find who I am
And I lie to myself and say I
Do the best that I can
Shrug it off like it ain't nothing
Like it's out of my hands
Then get ticked off whenever I
See it affecting my plans
And I regret watchin' these trust
Issues eat me alive
And at the rate I'm goin'
They'll probably still be there when I die
Congratulations, you'll always have a
Room in my mind the question is
Will I ever clean the walls off in time?

Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
And slept in
Broken legs, but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Inside this mansion

So this part of my house
No one's been in it for years
I built a safe room and I
Don't let no one in there 'Cause if I do
There's a chance that they might disappear
And not come back, and I admit
I am emotionally scared
To let anyone inside
So I just leave my doors locked
You might get other doors to open up
But this door's not
'Cause, I don't want you to have
The opportunity to hurt me
And I'll be the only person that I
Can blame when you desert me
I'm barricaded inside, so stop watchin'
I'm not coming to the door, so stop knockin'
Stop knockin' i'm trapped here
God keeps saying I'm not locked in
I chose this, I am lost in my own conscience
I know that shuttin' the world
Out ain't solvin' the problem
But, I didn't build this house because
I thought it would solve 'em
I built it because I thought that
It was safer in there but, it's not
I'm not the only thing that's livin' in here
Fear came to my house years ago, I let him in
Maybe that's the problem
'cause I've been dealing with this ever since
I thought that he would
Leave, but it's obvious, he never did
He must have picked a room and
Got comfortable and settled in
Now I'm in a position
It's either sit here and let 'em win
Or put him back outside where he came from
But, I never can 'Cause in order to do that
I'd have to open the doors
Is that me or the fear
Talking? I don't know anymore

It's lonely
Inside (Inside) , inside (Inside)
It's lonely (It's lonely)
Oh, yeah, it's lonely inside this mansion