Baba Brinkman - Sexual Selection lyrics

[Baba Brinkman - Sexual Selection lyrics]

I'm cocky and single and I
Got your genes tingling
Girl, with my costly signaling
Rockin' the rhythm and all
You keep thinkin' about
Is the offspring we'll bring into the world
And you're awfully tempting
So you got my genes tingling
Too, with your costly signaling
You're cute, but you gotta be considerate
And have a sense of humour
Or you will not be interesting

Charles Darwin saw natural selection as
The most serious cause of evolution
But what was going on with bird songs
And peacocks? They follow mysterious laws
And then Darwin had a curious thought
It probably occurred to him
While explaining his theory
To a young Victorian blond
Whose face displayed
A mixture of desire and feverish awe
The immediate cause of which
Darwin clearly saw so he said: "My dear
Descent with modification comes from
The struggle for survival and reproduction
Hence, the reason for some
Structures must be seduction" in fact
Darwin's brain was probably
One such structure
Just as peacocks' tails show off the
Genes of the top males
And likewise the songs of nightingales
The fighting skills of elephant seals
And minnows with colourful scales
These are all trait's that
Sexual selection has shaped
Through the female preference to get
With the fittest mates
But in human beings that
Selection goes both ways
Pretty much anything that's just for display
And isn't meant dissuade or
Chase predators away
Was probably selected for in a sexual way
But wait, isn't this just such a display?
I mean
I really thought I had something to say
But, is it just a demonstration of my DNA?
And, so what if it is? Great
What's to explain?
Okay, maybe a couple of things
First, to say that something ornate
Like complex language
First evolved as a seductive display
Doesn't mean that people only use
It just to get laid
Darwin leaves Freud in the dustbin, okay?
For instance
I could use a urine stream to put out a fire
But that doesn't mean the penis
Evolved as bush fire fighter
This is a theory of language function
A theory of where it comes from
What it's used for now
Is a separate discussion so which was it?
Was language originally a mechanism
For survival or reproduction?
Can you talk a predator out of attacking?
Can you talk a parasite out of infecting?
Can you talk a potential
Mate in to consenting?
Potentially, right? Hence, presenting
The grand unified theory of rhyme
The mating mind uses lyrical signs
Combined with wit
And wordplay, conversation
Humour and different narrative styles
To appraise the fitness of mates
Both for the purpose of marriage ties
And for mates of the more temporary kind
These are the humble roots
Of the literary sublime
We're all just Shakespearean primates
Verbalizing our cherry behinds
But how could we test this theory of mine?
Ideally, we could use
Experimental holding zoos
Filled with human subjects
And with an overhead view
We could observe which
Breeding pairs reproduce
And how often they use their
Verbal ornaments to seduce
We could even separate them
Into control groups
To see whether male or female vocals
Are more prone to be
Used to stimulate hormones
Although, it's true that this sort
Of method isn't normally approved
If only there existed in a state of nature
Some cultural group preoccupied
With makin' paper
And parading naked women shakin'
Their money makers
In front of competitive males
Displaying mating behaviour
While trading their creativity
For sexual favours if such a group existed
I predict it would be a major
Player in the entertainment industry
And would be in major
Danger of being overwhelmed by
Angry player haters
But, I may have to save some
Of my research for later
And how do I answer the
Charge that I'm participating
In this mating dance myself
With these dazzling bars?
That isn't hard – I plead guilty
I worked hard to achieve this ability
And if it also gives my genes
Visibility then so be it but, I confess
It also reveals my unique disability
See, my tendency to tell these monkey fables
And funny medieval tales, generally fails
To attract any nubile young females
It does attract women a lot though
All highly-educated and post-menopausal!
I know, isn't it awful?
I get mobbed after my Chaucer shows
By grandmas thanking me for
Making it possible
For them to appreciate a Hip-Hop flow
And, you might ask
Where are their granddaughters?
My guess is, they're at gangster rap concerts
But that's how sexual selection works
Any mutation gets tested first
And if it doesn't get spread
Then it gets purged
So this experimental Hip-Hop mix
Where it gets crossed with
Literature and lectures
Will probably get the burial that it deserves
That is, unless you spread it like whispers
I'm cocky and single and I
Got your genes tingling
Girl, with my costly signaling
Rockin' the rhythm and all
You keep thinkin' about
Is the offspring we'll bring into the world
And you're awfully tempting
So you got my genes tingling
Too, with your costly signaling
You're cute, but you gotta be considerate
And have a sense of humour
Or you will not be interesting

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