Joe Budden - Now I Lay lyrics

"Pump it up, you came to get it crunk
A dame and shit and drunk
You came to get it on"
That's when it all got started, I mean
Back then I wasn't so cold hearted
With every stanza came an extravaganza
For every question he got one less answer
I was tryin' to be more than cool
Nah, it was before that
Maybe boarding school
That was back when I would
Want to endanger myself
Maybe it was just to entertain myself
I don't need help, I could change myself
Fuck ya'll, I ain't gotta explain myself
Death's around the corner
I could hear his footsteps
Does he think that I'm the only
Nigga in the hood left
So tell any listener of mine
For twenty-eight years been a
Prisoner of the mind
Now I lay me down to sleep, and I
I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I
If I should die before I wake, then I
I pray the Lord my soul to take, I mean

Welcome everybody into the brain
Of a self-proclaimed sinner
Even when he can't win
That nigga won't surrender
Boones Farm put the wheels in motion
I felt every emotion except devotion
Message in a bottle in the
Bottom of the ocean
But, I can't swim, dammit I can't win
So I don't care how you rate me
It'd take a long time to evaluate me
So if, this be the last time you hear me
Just know I got a loved one near me
Please don't cry, let an eye get teary
A nigga good, finally I'm somewhere care free
Past is frightening but the future's scary
And I'm, gettin' to the point that I fear me
In a class all alone, don't compare me
But, I'll
Blame God this is where he steered me

They tell me that eyes is the
Window to a man's soul
So what you happen to see
A nigga can't control and I turned a def ear
To anything an anybody that'll
Get my head clear
Why shake the dice if you never gon roll em
I told em
That the straitjacket can't hold em
I ain't psycho, don't belittle me now
It's just a title cause they
Couldn't figure me out
If you give a damn when shit hit's the fan
Please know anything I ever
Did a nigga planned
Tryin' to better, high as ever
Since I learned how to lie to a lie detector
Still I'm damaged
They say if you stay in that boat long
Enough you'll see where the land is
So I'm right where I need to be
Please believe it believe it please
Let's get on our knees