Knowmads - Hurt Myself lyrics

Sometimes I think about if I
Lived a different way
Or if I ended it the way
I planned on Christmas day
Never grew into a man what
Would the people think
I hate alcohol because alcohol
Is a evil drink
Nice that I don't care to remember
At all and starin at
The wall just wishin that that
Bitch would call back
Slip and fall back into my depression deeper
No answer but experience is
The greatest teacher
Cause now I don't fear nothin
Not even the Grim Reaper i've been deeper
People who promised me to be for
Me forever they wasn't there either
My family treated my like a
Old pair of sneakers
Worn out on the road with
My speakers blown out
Thinkin out loud "What the fuck
Am I gonna do now"
Wasn't the proudest of my moments when
I begged a homie to let
Me sleep on his couch tomorrow
Cause I felt so lonely
In the studio she said "You seem unusual
Cause you're the one that shown
Me that life is beautiful"
Truth used to go so far I felt like now
Honesty seems to have a very short shelf life
The truth hurts I tried to hurt my
Self twice, first with sleeping pills
The second time I tried a knife
I never felt that type of crazy in my life
Made a atheist feel like I
Should pray to Jesus Christ
I don't even know if god can hear me right
But belief in something greater
Made my spirit fight
Even when your window is fogged up plus your
Job sucks coughen up a few bucks
What a dreary life let me reiterate
Move into a bigger state
Down a interstate in the interest
Of bigger dinner plates
Plan to shine like some
Stars that never disintegrate