Parenthetical Girls - On Death & Endearments lyrics

Gentlemen, please, rise
In light of why we're gathered here tonight
This is it, though I'm shit with goodbyes
Suffice to say, well, I haven't much time

So how I chose and choose
To make use of this life allotted me
Well you few know and knew
And each played to me begrudging accessory

So I should think it wise
In debt to your unseemly sacrifice
To see that when I die
None of my sordid scenes come to light
For me, I see no need
To catalogue what deeds I may have done
If we all agreed to keep
These terms of my demise unclarified

History, She will surely forgive me
And history, She will think of me fondly

Time was I had half a mind to just apologize
In days less dignified
Before I knew what to and not to do

And sure, of course
There's shame in certain things
I may have done but shame is not remorse
And pandering's the one thing
Even I can't afford

Measure me in grief
Survived in score by prideful progeny
And I, though sometimes weak
Still shudder to speak these secrets we keep

For their sake, let me stay
Ostensibly this saint I seemed to be
For now, my nose is clean
So bury these peculiarities with me

History, She will surely forgive me
And history, She will scarcely forget me

So no tearful goodbyes
In light of why we're gathered here tonight
To you, whom I confide
Suffice to say, well, I haven't much time