Psychostick - Obey The Beard lyrics

Mustache? No sideburns? No
Goatee? Maybe beard? Beard!

Do you feel alone? Do you feel neglected?
Not doin' too well with the ladies?
Well I got the solution for you!

Low self esteem? Grow a beard!
Afraid to follow your dreams? Grow a beard!
Are you lonely and sad? Grow a beard!
Wanna look good in plaid? Grow a beard!
Are you workin' out? Grow a beard!
Did your car break down? Grow a beard!
Ice caps melting? Grow a beard!
Are you stuck in the middle of nowhere and
You need to make an important phone call
But the battery's dead and you can't find
An outlet to plug in your charger?

Grow a beard!

Grow the beard! Feed the beard!
Brush the beard! Manscape the beard!
Stroke the beard! Love the beard!
Fear the beard! Obey the beard!
Obey the beard!

(Obey the beard)
Behold the beard! (Obey the beard)
Accept the beard! (Obey the beard)
Respect the beard! (Obey the beard)

"Oh my god, Becky
Look at his beard! It's just so beard!"

Impress your date, with your beard!
Eat a steak, with a beard!
Chop down trees, with a beard!
Crush your enemies, with a beard!

Catch a fish, with a beard!
Roundhouse kick, with a beard!
Trawl the net, with a beard!
Chia pet? Ch-ch-ch chia, beard!

Drive a truck, with a beard!
Try your luck, with a beard!
Arm wrestle, with a beard!
Teenage Mutant Ninja beard

Pet your doggie, with a beard!
I pledge allegiance to the beard!
Can't grow a beard? Then buy a beard!
Do you have a beard? Then grow more beard

"You need to shave this thing!"
Shut up, Grandma, grow a beard!

Defend the beard! Drink to the beard!
'Cause beards are good and scruff!

(Obey the beard)
Behold the beard! (Obey the beard)
Accept the beard! (Obey the beard)
Respect the beard! (Obey the beard)

I was so empty and lost inside
'Til I grew you ('til I grew you)
I put my faith in my facial hair
To get me through

Well I can defy the odds again and again
With you on my chin (you on my chin)
With every moment you grow closer and closer
To my heart

"Sigh i love you beard"
"If you love it so much
Why don't you just marry it?" "Huh"

"Do you take this beard to
Be your lawfully wedded beard
For bearder or for worse, in
Scruffiness and in beard
'til shave do you part?" "I beard!"

(Beard! Beard! Beard! Beard!
Beard! Beard! Beard)

Abe Lincoln had a beard zZ Top, epic beards!
Dimebag Darrell, metal beard!
Chuck Norris, kickass beard!

Number one, make it beard!
Chewbacca, is a beard!
Santa Claus, Jesus Christ god has a beard!

Obey the beard! Obey the beard!
Obey the beard! Obey the beard!