Quadeca, Peter Kuli - Consensus lyrics

Think I've got a consensus
Bein' lost in the trenches
Adolescent lessons expressin' God's job
Is to tempt us makin' it hard to stay alive
It's so easy to die
Makin' you hang your head low
But say "Reach for the skies"
Life is a walkin' contradiction
I've seen through it's lies
I'm just tryna tell the stories
I've seen through it's eyes
I feel I'm forcin' and feedin'
Of off reasons to cry
With all this fake deep bullshit
I'm too eager to try
Everybody sendin' blessings in need of reply
Tryna sell they own tears
'fore they bleed and they dry
Fuck your demons inside
I'm in need of the "Why?"
So I can summarize my life
Through my breathin' and sigh
Like, oh well, I can say that I tried, yeah
Hopped in this life and then
I stayed for the ride
So many beautiful faces
But they vacant inside
And I'm just patiently waitin' for
The day I decide, yeah
This reminds me of days when I drive in LA​
I'm screamin' "Hi" to the sky
Out with a smile on my face
Now I'm hidin' my face
I keep tryin' to trace
All of the steps that I had
Taken to findin' my place
Swept out to oceans so lonely
Waves feel like an embrace
And now I'm lookin' at my mic
Like it's sent as a prophet (yeah)
I used to be an atheist
But that turned me agnostic (Ahaha, yeah)
Recently, I've been wonderin' if
I've fuckin' lost it
See my friends from kindergarten go to rehab
That's the type of shit that
Makes you think back
To simpler times, blissfully ignorant minds
Before reality could ground us
We would live in the skies
And as a- and as a kid
I never thought I'd be bein' like this (Nah)
And as a kid
I never thought this would even exist (Nah)
I felt elusive, intangible
Just steam in the mist
And now I'm wakin' up feelin'
I ain't even this shit
You only look at what you got
Once you see that it's lost
And life's too gradual for me
To believe in my sauce
Don't understand rappers braggin'
"I got that paper on me"
Man, I got kids in schools
Who doin' presentations on me
So what the fuck you really value
Tryna take that from me? To me
I'll take that over Rollies
And makin' some money
Rain or sunny, I'ma do this every day
I study and write these lyrics till
My brain is fuzzy, damn
Like Tyler, Creator tweets, I just capitalize
These Romans tally up my hit's
With the capital 'I's this is a natural high
I seen it comin' from afar
I'm still actin' surprised
But I ain't mastered the skies
I wrote this album so much passion
I actually cried
They think 'cause I was never trappin'
My rap is a lie
They think 'cause I'm an awkward kid
I'm invalid as DJ Khaled's son receivin' a
Platinum plaque for bein' alive
Threw out half of my album
It wasn't good enough
Shit, I mean, it still isn't good enough
I'm like an active volcano
I know I could erupt
But I guess I am not full enough (yeah)
I swear, the higher you get
That's the lower you feel
Man, that's more shit you gotta do
Or you won't get a deal
Man, that's more shit you gotta prove
So they know that it's real
Thirty seconds of listenin'
Thinking you know how I feel
Yeah, this a motherfuckin' thesis statement
Came a long way, I cannot be complacent
Every day I wake up stressed
I have to be the greatest and if not
Then that's a day I truly feel I've wasted
Most of the pressure on my
Shoulders is comin' from me so when I die
I know I left us with somethin' to leave
So when I wake up every
Mornin' with somewhere to be damn
I got so much shit I've- -Got-I've
I've got somethin' to see?
I don't fuckin' know, man
Shit hope that sounded genuine
Because I meant it