Bright Eyes - Hit the Switch lyrics

I'm staring out into that vacuum again
From the back porch of my mind
The only thing that's alive i'm all there is
And I start attacking my vodka
Stab the ice with my straw
My eyes have turned red as stoplights
You seem ready to walk
You know I'll call you eventually
When I wanna talk 'Til then you're invisible

Cause there's a switch that gets hit
And it all stops making sense
And in the middle of drinks
Maybe the fifth or the sixth
I'm completely alone at a table of friends
I feel nothing for them i feel nothing
Nothing

Well, I need a break from the city again
I think I'll ship myself back west
I got a friend there, she says
"Hey, any time" unless that offer's expired
I have been less than frequent
She's under no obligation to
Indulge every whim
And I'm so ungrateful, I take
She gives and forgives
And I keep forgetting it

And each morning she wakes
With a dream to describe
Something lovely that bloomed
In her beautiful mind
I said "I'll trade you one
For two nightmares of mine
I have some where I die
I have some where we all die"

I'm thinking of quitting drinking again
I know I said that a couple times
And I'm always changing my mind
Well, I guess I am
But there's this burn in my stomach
And there's this pain in my side
And when I kneel at the toilet
And the morning's clean light
Pours in through the window
Sometimes I pray I don't die
I'm a goddamn hypocrite

But the night rolls around
And it all starts making sense
There is no right way or wrong way
You just have to live and so I do what I do
And at least I exist
What could mean more than this?
What would mean more, mean more?