Canibus - Covid Santa lyrics
[Canibus - Covid Santa lyrics]
The scenery starts off with a slow
Pan from a drone cam
And a drone operator with cold hands
A Bodybag Ben beat bumps
A chime from a grandfather clock
Made of pinewood with walnut studs
A pearly red unfinished sleigh
Bed of carbon fiber
One can only guess to fly higher
And faster from being lighter
Pieces of liquor bottle shards
Crunched atop squeaky floorboards
Screens on walls flashing on and off
Weather Report killington Vermont, Whistler
Snow King Resort
Black Diamond conditions travel restricted
And closed off
A shipment of hummingbird broth was lost
Because it couldn't gеt across
Mrs claus had a psychotic blow off
And that's why we were callеd
But now that we are here we are seeing
Things are much more deeper than we thought
The whole compound was a pigsty
Black mold in the carpet
Mouldy half-eaten cookies
Milk rotting in cartons
The elves moved all the factory
Equipment out of the way
Twice a week they throw raves
Nora En Pure DJs
Mrs claus doesn't know what to do
She just stays in her room
They say she has a Fentanyl problem too
Okay, Ms claus is the spouse
For now we can rule her out
But we need to find the man of the house
They say he's in bad shape
Just look at the landscape
I don't care if it's manmade or not
It's a damn shame mrs claus stopped payment
The Goods Department ran out of patience
The elves are working
For terrorist organizations
Rudolf's nose is sick, he can't walk for shit
He's certified fit for service but
He's got bone cyst
Dancer and Prancer have capped
Hocks in fluid blocks
We're wondering what Santa's gonna do
When the music stops
In our first conversation we asked Ms claus
About her GPS ankle bracelet
She remained complacent
We asked Ms claus, "Can you please
Take us to Santa?"
She looked over at one of the elves
Wouldn't give us an answer
Now this elf was whistling Amazing
Grace and didn't say much
Looked like he had a pistol tucked
Straight thug he said he was a playa in
The global human settlement layer
And he accepted revenue from Lord Maitreya
Another elf said, "We'll take you to Santa
But we need your passport, phone
Radio and your helmet camera" i complied
Gave him all four without blinking an eye
They opened the door and took me outside
We walked downrange to a Buckminster
Fuller building type frame
With a door that had a kryptonite chain
I almost couldn't believe
I heard the whirling sound of a machine
You would use to help somebody breathe
At first, I see bare feet, the EKG beep
I move closer
Then I see rosacea in both cheeks
I see tubes carrying red blood
Out of two man boobs through a machine
Then back into a hand turned blue
I was so confused
I turned around to the elves and said
"What in Satan's name have
You done to yourselves?"
One of the elves stepped forward
He said, "This is hard to ignore
But I owe you an explanation
I'm not a doctor, but I'm not an impostor
I'm a medical proctor and I don't
Think he's got much longer
You see, lactic acid is green
Uric acid is orange
Sulfuric acid is yellow but
Santa's is much darker
His citric acid is clear
I know that I'm a fast talker
But he's gonna die without
The proper anatomic markers
'cause his interstitial fluids have been
Mixing with unknown Biopollutants
Turning him into some kind of mutant"
In other words, technically Santa's entire
Genomic integrity's
In great jeopardy's what he said to me
And he's been treated for the latest strain
He's positive
Non-homologous, we contacted Dr oculus
Our last communicate placed him
In two hours away
But, I should warn you if he's not here
We have to operate "Operate how? Here? Sure
There's rat shit everywhere
This is a fucking sanitary nightmare!
Good idea, glad you're in charge
You're doing a great job
Look at him! Don't you think
Santa looks a bit gone?"
Antibody dependent enhancement
What are Santa's chances?
Don't they make an ozonated cream for cancer?
You little shit
You be using my phone to look at dick pics
When I was your age
I used to work at the Big Dig
Fluorescent, illuminated X rays
Polyethylene death sprays
From a nuclear submarine's wet bay (Yay)
You are pathogenically primed for prime time
The meter says 9, 9, 9, 9
And now Christmas is fucked
I hope you're satisfied
What you gon' do now Santa done died?
Pan from a drone cam
And a drone operator with cold hands
A Bodybag Ben beat bumps
A chime from a grandfather clock
Made of pinewood with walnut studs
A pearly red unfinished sleigh
Bed of carbon fiber
One can only guess to fly higher
And faster from being lighter
Pieces of liquor bottle shards
Crunched atop squeaky floorboards
Screens on walls flashing on and off
Weather Report killington Vermont, Whistler
Snow King Resort
Black Diamond conditions travel restricted
And closed off
A shipment of hummingbird broth was lost
Because it couldn't gеt across
Mrs claus had a psychotic blow off
And that's why we were callеd
But now that we are here we are seeing
Things are much more deeper than we thought
The whole compound was a pigsty
Black mold in the carpet
Mouldy half-eaten cookies
Milk rotting in cartons
The elves moved all the factory
Equipment out of the way
Twice a week they throw raves
Nora En Pure DJs
Mrs claus doesn't know what to do
She just stays in her room
They say she has a Fentanyl problem too
Okay, Ms claus is the spouse
For now we can rule her out
But we need to find the man of the house
They say he's in bad shape
Just look at the landscape
I don't care if it's manmade or not
It's a damn shame mrs claus stopped payment
The Goods Department ran out of patience
The elves are working
For terrorist organizations
Rudolf's nose is sick, he can't walk for shit
He's certified fit for service but
He's got bone cyst
Dancer and Prancer have capped
Hocks in fluid blocks
We're wondering what Santa's gonna do
When the music stops
In our first conversation we asked Ms claus
About her GPS ankle bracelet
She remained complacent
We asked Ms claus, "Can you please
Take us to Santa?"
She looked over at one of the elves
Wouldn't give us an answer
Now this elf was whistling Amazing
Grace and didn't say much
Looked like he had a pistol tucked
Straight thug he said he was a playa in
The global human settlement layer
And he accepted revenue from Lord Maitreya
Another elf said, "We'll take you to Santa
But we need your passport, phone
Radio and your helmet camera" i complied
Gave him all four without blinking an eye
They opened the door and took me outside
We walked downrange to a Buckminster
Fuller building type frame
With a door that had a kryptonite chain
I almost couldn't believe
I heard the whirling sound of a machine
You would use to help somebody breathe
At first, I see bare feet, the EKG beep
I move closer
Then I see rosacea in both cheeks
I see tubes carrying red blood
Out of two man boobs through a machine
Then back into a hand turned blue
I was so confused
I turned around to the elves and said
"What in Satan's name have
You done to yourselves?"
One of the elves stepped forward
He said, "This is hard to ignore
But I owe you an explanation
I'm not a doctor, but I'm not an impostor
I'm a medical proctor and I don't
Think he's got much longer
You see, lactic acid is green
Uric acid is orange
Sulfuric acid is yellow but
Santa's is much darker
His citric acid is clear
I know that I'm a fast talker
But he's gonna die without
The proper anatomic markers
'cause his interstitial fluids have been
Mixing with unknown Biopollutants
Turning him into some kind of mutant"
In other words, technically Santa's entire
Genomic integrity's
In great jeopardy's what he said to me
And he's been treated for the latest strain
He's positive
Non-homologous, we contacted Dr oculus
Our last communicate placed him
In two hours away
But, I should warn you if he's not here
We have to operate "Operate how? Here? Sure
There's rat shit everywhere
This is a fucking sanitary nightmare!
Good idea, glad you're in charge
You're doing a great job
Look at him! Don't you think
Santa looks a bit gone?"
Antibody dependent enhancement
What are Santa's chances?
Don't they make an ozonated cream for cancer?
You little shit
You be using my phone to look at dick pics
When I was your age
I used to work at the Big Dig
Fluorescent, illuminated X rays
Polyethylene death sprays
From a nuclear submarine's wet bay (Yay)
You are pathogenically primed for prime time
The meter says 9, 9, 9, 9
And now Christmas is fucked
I hope you're satisfied
What you gon' do now Santa done died?