Capstan - Decline lyrics

My self depravity
A stark duality
Stare into the black
Depressive reality

A masochist who can't feel a thing
The paradox is suffocating me

Well it gets better but it
Feels like it's worse
Because I'm tethered to the past
It's a curse
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt

Cause every day that I
Should wake up grateful
I'm pulled back into a negative space
Still fear I'm not enough
Failure stitched in my seams

It's all fiction
Horrific depiction
Violent condition

Well it gets better but it
Feels like it's worse
Because I'm tethered to the past
It's a curse
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt
Or can I ever overcome it and learn?
Do I endeavor to retain all my hurt?
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt

I can't live up to what you want from me
I'm not enough, failure stitched in my seams

Well it gets better but it
Feels like it's worse
Because I'm tethered to the past
It's a curse
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt

Well it gets better but it
Feels like it's worse
Because I'm tethered to the past
It's a curse
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt
Or can I ever overcome it and learn?
Do I endeavor to retain all my hurt?
I know it's better but I think it gets worse
Until they put me in the dirt