Chris Webby - Dinner And A Movie lyrics

Ye ye yeah
It all started when I met her couldn't help but to sweat her
She was bad - so I hit her with that "hey, I'm Chris Webster"
Spit a little game had some drinks when I left her
She handed me a number and suggested that I texted her
Weeks went by and I'm scrolling through my whole index
Saw the name Susie so I send her an emoji text - kissy face
Then I got an "oh hey you", "what up yo"
"Nothing boo, let's get drunk, come through"
Get her address and I GPS'ed it
Thinking we gon' have some drink and dinner over Netflix
Maybe smoke a joint, then later have some sex with
Her, not knowing that she's crazy and obsessive
Got there, she had four cats now I got alarms going
Off in my brain but she was hot so I ignored 'em
Posters of me on her wall now my eyes open
To the fact this bitch is psycho now the shit is really showing
I had one drink and my eyes got lower
Speak started slurring and my mind got slower
Then I realized I got roofied and I'm fucking fell over
"Welcome here, silly pants, come sit with me on the sofa"


"FUCK, this is not good, Chris, hold it together, dude"
"Now you're mine, Christian, we'll be together forever boo"
"This is bad, this is bad, I can't even stand yo"
Then my vision cuts to black, like the end of The Sopranos

I met a girl once, her name was Susie
Little did I know that she already knew me
I got a number and I hollered in a few weeks
Unaware she was a bad shit groupie
Went to her house, tryna get some gucci
Had a drink and I started feeling woozy
Then I realized, I got roofied
And I just thought we'd get some dinner and a movie

Woke up the next day, handcuffed to aheadboard
Butt ass naked, hickies everywhere
Neck sore, dick sore, leg sore
This is what I get for trustin' bitches
When I break free, oh you gone get yours
Vision blurry and my memory's shitty
In a dark ass basement, where the fuck is she?
Probably upstairs with her cats, watching Sex and the City
I need to break free, come on now, Webby be widdy
See my pants on the ground and I grab 'em with my foot
Kick 'em up to where my hands are at, let's get ourselves a look
What do you know, I got an adderal up in my left pocket
So I popped it, (da dada dadah) don't need a locksmith
Rip those cuffs off like Kong in captivity
Put my socks on and hear "No, you can't freaking leave, you're all mine"
"Crazy ass bitch, are you kidding me?"
Then she pulled a steak knife out and tried sticking me
I ran around and then I sprinted up the fucking stairs
Still wearing only my socks, not even my underwear
She's chasing me and I can't remember where the door is
She made it to the kitchen, throwing silverware a fork hit
My bare dick - then I took a spoon to my left nut
"You wanna play bitch, okay, well guess what?"
But I had nothing to follow that statement
So I started to charge her at the full speed buttnaked

I met a girl once, her name was Susie
Little did I know that she already knew me
I got a number and I hollered in a few weeks
Unaware she was a bad shit groupie
Went to her house, tryna get some gucci
Had a drink and I started feeling woozy
Then I realized, I got roofied
And I just thought we'd get some dinner and a movie

I was halfway to her then her cats start attacking me
Swiping at my penis, jumping on my back scratching me
Grab 'em by the tail, and I swung 'em like some nun-chucks
Ron Jeremy style, beat those pussies the fuck up
"Don't hurt my fucking cats, I'll kill you, I really will yo"
Then I tackled her ass through a glass window
We fell down, she looked around and grabbed a sharp glass shard
And stabbed me in the ribs, then she stabbed me in the abs hard
Then she broke away, I started bleeding out
And I seen her runnin' towards the fucking neighbours house
Grabbed a stick up off the lawn and threw it hard
Done, she stumbled, tripped and fell face down in the neighbours garden
Caught up to this bitch, step up in some mud and slipped
Laying in the grass "someone call 9-1-1 quick"
Looked and seen Susie knocked out on a damn tomato plant
Neighbours calling cops and reporting a crazy naked man
Drag myself bleedin' right up to the driveway
Got quick in my car and hit top speed on the highway
Made it to the hospital, bloody, nude and exhausted
Almost didn't make it, the doctor just couldn't call it
But I did and I never heard from Susie again
Now I'll never touch another fucking groupie again
Never be that fucking thirsty for the gucci again
And meet a chick for dinner and a fucking movie again