Christy Moore - Delerium Tremens lyrics

Goodbye to the port and brandy
To the vodka and the Stag
To the Smithwicks and the
Harp and the bottle, draught and keg
As I sat lookin' up at the Guinness
And I could never figure out
How your man stayed up on the
Surfboard after 14 pints of stout

I dreamt a dream the other night
Jaysus I couldn't sleep a wink
The rats were tryin' to count the sheep and
I was tryin' to get off the drink
There was footsteps in the parlour
And voices on the stairs
And I was climbin' up the walls and
I was movin' round the chairs
I looked out from under the blanket
And up at the fireplace
There was the Pope and John
F kennedy and Jack Charlton
And the three of them were starin' in me face
And suddenly it dawned at me
Hey by God I think I'm getting the DTs
When the Child o' Prague began
To dance around the mantlepiece
I went, goodbye to the port and brandy
To the vodka and the Stag
To the Smithwicks and the
Harp and the bottle, draught and keg
As I sat lookin' up at the Guinness
And I could never figure out
How your man stayed up on the
Surfboard after 14 pints of stout

Well I swore upon the bible that
I'd never again touch a drop
I tell ya my heart was palpitatin'
I was sure it was going to stop
And thinkin' I was dyin' I gave
My soul to God to keep
And ten pounds to St anthony to
Help me find some sleep
I fell into an awful nightmare
And got a dreadful shock
When I dreamt there was no duty-free
In the airport down in Knock

I I dreamt an Paisley was sayin' the rosary
And Mother Theresa was taking the pill
And Frank Patterson was out of his head be
God and he was singin' Spancil Hill

Goodbye to the port and brandy
To the vodka and the Stag
To the Smithwicks and the
Harp and the bottle, draught and keg
As I sat lookin' up at the Guinness
And I could never figure out
How your man stayed up on the
Surfboard after 14 pints of stout

I dreamt I was in ecstacy in
Heaven and agony in Hell
I was bored in limbo
And then I was in purgatory as well
And there was original sins and venial sins
And mortal by the score
So I tied barbed wired around my underpants
And I flagilated myself on the floor
Then I dreamt I was in the confessional box
And the auld Bishop said to me, he said
"Any impure thoughts my child?" - the
Fuckin' barbed wire was killing me!
And then I dreamt I was in the jacuzzi
With that auld whore in number 10
And then I knew that I'd never ever
Ever drink again

I went, goodbye to the port and brandy
To the vodka and the Stag
To the Smithwicks and the
Harp and the bottle, draught and keg
As I sat lookin' up at the Guinness
And I could never figure out
How your man stayed up on the
Surfboard after 14 pints of stout