Clutch - 24 Earth Years lyrics

I don't know, but, I've been told I'm about
24 Earth years old
And come my next birthday
It'll be a quarter century i don't know
But, I have heard a gnome from
The old world say these words
"Take a look now what the
Cat dragged in: a red
Dead woodpecker and two of my kin"

Back in 1980, we played the AD&D
That game was harder than
The Elfstones of Shannara
My character was baffling, a druid, wizard
Halfling on top of that he was
Master of psionic powers
Bring on the hordes, we have the sword
That smote the Goblin of Gygaxnor
Pray that the sisters name us as victors
Of the twenty sided die, yeah

Long ago in Middle Earth
A man could measure all his worth
By his blade and by his staff
And by the runes on his epitaph

Go mount your horse and ride up north
To seek the Baron of the Frozen Berg
Ask for assistance in the resistance
Of the twenty sided die

Saw Mazes and Monsters
Tom Hanks completely bonkers
He spoke what he doth speaketh in Elizabethan
Sad lad, he really couldn't handle
Starting from scratch
On the very first level
But he died the death of a warrior

A legend grows yearly by way of local psalm
The bishop and castle move
In defense of pawns
I'm rolling, I'm tumbling a twenty sided die
A legend grows yearly by way of local psalm