Esham - Mama Was a Junkie lyrics

Mama was a junkie sometimes I used to wonder
Whether she'd be better off alive
Or six feet under
Late nights go by, no sleep
Born into a junkie's world it's so deep
Crack pipes crack vials
Cracked up person
Some days it's bad then other days much worse
I used to never go to sleep, in fear
Trying to hide the pain
And front like I didn't care
The neighborhood knew just what
Had happened to me
At night they said the Devil
Was rapping to me but on the streets I could
Feel my mother's heartbeat
And every time she gets frightened
It quickly repeats the way the junkie lives
And what the junkie gives
Hard times and problems
And stress for their own kids
No sense in rehabilitation
Growing up in humiliation
The aroma of base makes me choke
I could almost die from the
Smell of the crack smoke different men
Going out, and coming in and in my eyes
I witnessed the first people's sin
And I was only 3 they thought I couldn't see
But in my eyes mama was a junkie

A junkie trying to live a life
Such a sacrifice knowing wrong from right

A junkie trying to live a life
Such a sacrifice knowing wrong from right

J-U-N-K-IE to me some closed their eyes
And tried not to see
But, you can still smell it
Seeing is just as well
My mother unconsciously trapped in Hell
Now her life's on the line
And stuck to the grind and time after time
She's on my mind i'm thinking
"How could this happen to my
Mother? Not me bro"
But some nigga in my hood is slanging kilos
He's got a spot around the
Corner from the crib lord forgive her
For all the things she did i'm thinking
"Where was the police when
She was buying this?"
But, I know that police could
Give a fuck less
About another basehead on the street
But they'd rather pretend they don't see it
When they walk the beat
A black cop ain't good for shit but blackmail
And he knows that my mother's
Out here smoking llello
But black cops are blind they can't see
Cause in my eyes mama was a junkie

A junkie trying to live a life
Such a sacrifice knowing wrong from right

Mama lived the fast life pregnant at 14
Back in those days it wasn't crack
It was heroin shot it in her veins
To try to ease the pain
An unplanned pregnancy was made then I came
Straight from the womb
To witness my mama's doom and in my heart
I know the end's coming soon
Of all this junkie-ism
Neighborhood criticism her mind was gone
I felt she needed an exorcism
Speedballing, booze and the fast times
Pretty soon my mama lost
Her whole fucking mind
ADC, welfare recipient three children
Not enough dividends few good times
Only bad times and worse from speedballing
Her motherfucking heart burst
I wish I could have said
"I love you" before she left
Now my mind's forever haunted
With my mama's death i asked myself
"How could this happen to me?"
My mother OD'd cause she was a junkie

A junkie trying to live a life
Such a sacrifice knowing wrong from right