Greg MacPherson - Two Haircuts in One lyrics

Are you trying not to sleep?
In the back seat with a bottle
Went too heavy on the throttle
Stuck in a ditch
Some son of a bitch, tall
Slow pitch
Sleep
How many fingers waved
In front of your face?
Don’t pass yourself off
As a charity case
What was the name
On the accident claim?
Are you trying not to sleep?
Radio on, top of the ladder
At the beauty salon
Thinking his name when the colour
Goes on Try not to sleep
No one could keep up with
What you had planned
Shoveling snow and a mid-winter tan
20 minutes on the interstate
Figure 8 trying to stay awake
You try not to sleep
With the laminated heads
Your portfolio spread
Should’ve left it at home?
All by yourself but you’re never alone
Where’s all your money
From the house calls?
The head of the firm
With a 10 dollar perm
And dumber than a brick wall
You should’ve stayed and got fed
When you woke up in his bed
Or made a couple phone calls
You’re in it for the long haul

They’re rigging up chains
Sparks off the railing
And the Western White Pine
You’re dreaming of a kiss
Try not to miss
With your 20 dollar wine
Your hundred dollar fine
The solid yellow lines
Leave some in the back
Keep the top flat
Take some off the sides