Illogic - First Trimester lyrics

The love floods that drips from her
Eyes as they meet his
While inside she holds a gift
The virus of new life
Their hearts overflow with oceans
Of emotions mixed
Happiness, confusion, love, hate
All simultaneous
Holding her close as she drenches his
Chest with rivers of fear
A single tear sprints down his cheek
His knees become weak
He thinks, "here I sit
A child embracing a child
With child that's probably
More scared of this than I am
It's too late to question if
I'm ready for the responsibility
Cause, I knew the consequences of lust
But, I took part willingly"
Just then, her left hand graces his face


The love in her touch
Encourages tears to race
She wipes the rain from his cloudy eyes
Shaken and scared she takes his hand, smiles
And places it on her belly
His hand trembles, heart pounds
Mouth returns to smile
As inside, she frowns
Knowing she can't handle this right now
"I'm stuck in this spot between
Love and my culture
My cousin had a baby out of
Wedlock and they disowned her
Should I risk losing one family
To start my own?
Or if I don't have it, will he hate me
And make me stand alone
Leaving me to hold this bag of bricks
And carry it for a lifetime
While he can relieve the pain by just
Going home and writing a rhyme?
At that point he pulls her close
Whispers "I love you" to her lobes
Unbeknownst to the dichotomy in the
Beauty that he beholds

I love her now, and even after death
She's my breath
The only other close to my heart? my mother
I'm scared, but prepared to give my
Child what I was never given, a life
With it's father and it's mother, it's wife
I know realize my eyes see the horizon
I'm no longer looking for a
Kaleidoscope to climb in
Accepting my scenery
My fate parallel to grace
I know I'm in love every time
My eyes touch her face

I love him, but, I'm not ready to spring
A life into this world
I'm only 17, myself still a little girl
I need my family too much
To lose them for him
But, I need him by my side also
I'll have his baby someday
He's the only one I see in my future
But now's not the time
We still have things to experience
And live out our lives i can't do it
I've decided i'm only two months now
But how can I tell the love of
My life that I've murdered his child?

Alone she sit's
With oceans of regret soaking optics
Heart ripped to shreds with visions
Of a dead sea
No words can emerge from voice box to explain
The understood hate that seemed
To fuel his pain
His vital organ pounds till his
Chest starts to vibrate
Emotions unusual trapped in
Delusional mind state
He knows not what to feel, or what to say
How to react to the fact of
Should he leave or should he stay?
A cloud of sorrow hovers above
The two broken spirit's without a clue
Gloom so thick that love can't shine through
He's thinkin, "here I stand
Face to face with my angel
As the blood of our child soaks her hands
The hate I hold is a product
Of the love she evokes
So in an obscure way, I understand"
With arms outstretched
She lies his head upon her chest
And she cries and continues to apologize
"you know that I love you (I love you)
And you won't be to blame
If after this action
You never utter my name
But, I need time to mature
Before I give birth
We need time to explore and
Find what we're worth
One day I'll have your seed
Even if the sun rays burn
Out and the starlight bleeds"
Their eyes meet, and lips touch
I love yous are exchanged
And eyes lock till tear ducts
Flood with rivers of pain
Love won't let them leave
There was a hold on his heart
As much as my death hurt
It couldn't tear them apart
So now I rest on clouds
With other aborted missions
I forgive you and understand the
Purpose of your decision
I hope this story of my life
Hit's the depth of many souls
And when you want to tell me you love me
You don't have to cause, I know