Jake Miller - Steven lyrics

Yeah, look
Let me tell you about a kid named Steven
He's slowly running out of
Things to believe in
Every couple of months his mom leaves him
For no good reason his step dad beats him
Not too many friends
Only ever had a few of them
But recently they don't want anything
To do with him
Always eating lunch in the bathroom stall
He just wants to feel normal
And be cool again, yeah
Always feeling like the outcast
He's been going crazy ever
Since his dad passed
He needs guidance and advice but instead
He only has breakdowns and flashbacks
Of the car crash uh
It's been getting harder everyday
If he was still around
Everything would be okay
Cause his dad was always the light
At the end of the tunnel
But now that same damn tunnel
Is looking dark and grey
He keeps quiet in the back of the class
And when the bell rings
Steven hurries home fast
Scared to death the other kids will kick
His ass on the long walk home
Cause it's happened in the past so
He's getting used to the black
Eyes and fat lips but all he's got is a
Fake smile and cut wrists
Wishin' he could walk right up to
Them and show them the scars
And say look you're the reason
That I've done this
Maybe they would finally understand
And go back to
How it was before it all began
But he's just a little different so they
Taunt him and they beat him
Yeah it's all just fun and games
They don't give a damn, yeah
His older brother ain't around, in
And out of jail
Hanging with the wrong crowd
He's been doing coke, smoking weed
Getting drunk all his life he's a shame
No, he's not too proud
Now his habit's are rubbing off
On his little bro yeah, but guess what?
Little did he know that everytime
He did a line everytime he lit a joint
Everytime he took a shot he
Would set the mode
So Steven's sitting in his
Room getting high now
Doors locked, music up, with his lights out
He just takes another toke til
His room fills with smoke
5-6-7 hours til he knocks out
Now he started stealing pills from his mom
8-9-10 at a time and now they're gone
And maybe for a moment all
His problems seem to fade
But the high fades too after not too long
And that's when it really sinks in
And that's when it hit's him
That these god damn drugs won't fix him
Curled up on the floor, can't take it anymore
Now he's talking to God cuz he's
The only one that gets him
On his knees, looking up, can't stop crying
"God I know we haven't talked in a long time
But this time I really need
You please, God help me, say something
Just give me a sign
Because now I'm falling apart and
I don't think that I can do it please, God
Give me the strength
To pull through it tell me
Should I give up? I could
End it all right now
I just don't know if I'm
Brave enough to do it cuz there's gotta be a
Better way than suicide
Try to wait it out, give it time
You'll be fine
But, it's been so long and I still
Haven't been able to get rid
Of all the thoughts that I feel
Inside so sick, so angry, so mad
And to top it off no one even knows that"
That's when he stood up, wiped his tears
Walked over to his desk
And got a pen and a notepad
He just couldn't see it getting any better
So on a cold dark night in December
Steven knew exactly what he had to do
But first he sat down and
Wrote a couple letters
One to his step dad, one to his mother
Couple to the kids at school
One to his brother
Bringing them the pain that
They once brought him
Tear drops on the paper one after another
Yeah, I hope that you all feel guilty
Cuz I'm broken now and you can't heal me
And now you're all an accomplice in murder
Each and every one of you have
Chipped in to kill me so the reason that I'm
Writing you this evening
Is to say goodbye and to
Tell you that I'm leaving
But don't hold your breath cuz
I ain't never coming back
Sincerely yours, Steven