Momus - Welcome To My Show Trial lyrics

Welcome to my nightmare
Welcome to my show trial

I could've been a traitor
I could've been a tailor
I could've been a waiter
I could've been a failure

I chose to be a writer
Every writer is a traitor so here I am

Call me Pam call me Stan
Call me Gran

It's taking place in Imation
With no written constitution
Let alone a guarantee of
Freedom of expression
While the customs men still rummage for
Smut through every incoming package
Like a parcel sent to Britain
My show trial was open and shut

Call me Gran call me Stan
Call me the man here I am

And the weather is getting clever
More clever than ever
And a spot is a spot, until it is a blot
I'm a poet, I know it
I'm a writer in the mirror
Every writer is a traitor
I'm getting sillier and sillier

Here I am call me Stan
Call me Gran call me the man

Call me Anne call me Stan
Call me Gran call me the man
But here I am

I'm feeling poorly, before the jury
They're going to smoke a
Cigarette in the carpark
That shouldn't matter
But I've just delivered my own defense
I was a spiritual witness
I talked about the death of the nation
I spoke about duty, class, money, art
Orgasm and death i said "I possess none of
The above, except, perhaps
For orgasm and art"
Therefore, I had nothing to lose
I went on about ignoring the unwritten rules
Any suggestion that there's idiocy
In ordinary life
Any hint that children might understand
The facts about love
Any notion of normality might not be so ideal
What women think of men and what
Men really feel about women
In a penetrating x ray of the soul
Revelations of the secrets of
Professionals in guilds
These things are forbidden
By tacit understanding call me Stan
Call me the man call me an idiot
But, I spoke about you

Every writer is a traitor
And when I look in the mirror
I see a writer, therefore a traitor

Welcome to my show trial
Every owl is beguiled

Full fathom five my father lies
I am a writer and so play the game
Be a good chap