Night Birds - Neon Gray lyrics

I'm always sick I know they'll
Never find a cure
The stomach bile's just the promise
Of a future cancer
Ill choke the acid back and just get by
And I'll avoid thinking about how
Soon I'm gonna die

But if they had a remedy if
They somehow find a way
To end this anxious nausea or
Just keep it at bay
When they'd peer in my insides I
Know just what they'll say it's Neon Gray

I'll die alone I know that
There's no fucking doubt
I know I'll never find someone
Who gets what I'm about
I've tried but it's the same all in the end
They want to take so much I know
I can never let them in
And if I can find someone who
Can take my nervous hand
Calm my bastard temper and
Maybe somehow understand
When she'd look into my eyes
She'd see in my dull gaze it's Neon Gray

Neon Gray
Neon Gray – you're a broken human being
You're a thing you shouldn't say
The medication wears off by the
Darkening of the day
Every day that you breathe
Air it's Neon Gray

I've thought about ending it
All so many times
Spinning awake each night I plan it
All out in my mind
I've fantasized about how the hell and when
But I can never do it no
Matter how much I intend

The same thing that drives me to utter misery
It won't let me end my life, no
Not so easily
The fear of the unknown will drag
Me to my end of days it's Neon Gray