Ollie, Witt Lowry - Happier lyrics

Hold the pain, keep it silent

Hold the pain, keep it silent
No, my time only runnin' out
'Bout the way that I'm smilin'
Can nobody see I'm down?
Do my best to be okay
But that's all my feelin's allow
These thoughts slip from me always

All I think is how
Now nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Searching for where I belong
I just wanna be happier
Now, nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Learning from where I went wrong
I just wanna be happier (yeah) , yeah

The more I learn
The more I realize how much
I have left to lеarn
Remember back whеn seven fifty an
Hour was all I earned
And Mom was workin' overtime
Just tryna make things work
So every bill that came in
The mail came with concern
I thought maybe a degree could change
Some things for her and me
Was even honored by the dean
That didn't matter at all
I bought the lie they sold to me
At the expense of my own dreams
Said they had everything I need
Just need to pay for it all
Oh, fuck that, they used to
Tell me, "Fuck rap
You need to take a step back
Look in the mirror, Mark
And look at yourself"
They almost had me thinkin' I should
Put my dreams on the shelf
They don't believe in me just like
They don't believe in themselves
I took that chip and then I wore it proudly
Along the way I became fixated
On those who doubt me
Somehow lost sight of all the blessings
That were all around me
I let comparison and pressure
Almost fuckin' drown me
Was lost until I found me
I treated the world like it owed me
My self-worth came from comments from
People that didn't know me feelin' lonely
Feelin' like I let everybody else down
Barely recognizin' anyone now
And all I think is-

All I think is how
Now nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Searching for where I belong
I just wanna be happier
Now, nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Learning from where I went wrong
I just wanna be happier

I wanna partake in this rat race
Don't have a lot but have faith
And how can I create when my mind
Is in such a bad place?
I finally made some money
But more issues is what that made
Remember thinkin' that I'll be happy
Once I reach that place
But not so much, I did it, I felt the rush
But on the way
I left some people and things
I love in the dust
That's when I finally realized how
Now enough is never enough
I wear the smile on my face
And nobody has called my bluff
I'm honest, I may have added some commas
But what's naïve to think that
Money could alleviate problems
I let the numbers become all
The validation I seek
Now I know showin' my emotions
Doesn't mean that I'm weak
Despite what others may think
And maybe all along happiness was a choice
And I listened to their opinions
Instead of my inner voice
The old me just really wanted the
World to love and respect me
Now I'm sick of livin' life
For everybody except me so don't text me
All I want is to fuckin' live in the moment
Should appreciate the journey a little
More and I know it
Kept around the ones I trust
And cut everybody else out
Barely recognizin' anyone now
And all I think is-

All I think is how
Now nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Searching for where I belong
I just wanna be happier
Now, nothin' feels the same
No, nothin' feels the same
Learning from where I went wrong
I just wanna be happier

Searchin' for where I belong
I just wanna be happier now