Ray Stevens - My Better Half lyrics

Kick my shoe off, take my sock off
Pull my pant off
Find my pajama and I put it on
Then I crawl into bed and I cry my eye out
Now (Now) that my better half is gone (Gone)

I just lie there, and as I lie there
My arm feels so empty
And my lip longs to kiss her all night long
If I had the gut, I'd blow my brain out
Now (Now) that my better half is gone (Gone)

I was a whole man when I was with her
Now I'm a plier, I'm a scissor
I'm half this and half that
Half-slow and half-fast, oh

I've got the blue and I'm up
To my elbow in heartache
Now (Now) that my better half is gone (Gone)

Now (Now) that my better half is gone (Gone)