Ray Stevens - The Bricklayer's Song lyrics

Okay, here's a song about an Irishman
Who had a little bad luck
And I've been told this is a true story

Dear sir, i write this note to you to
Tell you of me plight
For at the time of writing
I am not a pretty sight
Me body is all black and blue
Me face a deathly grey
And I write this note to tell you
Why I'm not at work today

While working on the fourteenth floor
Some bricks I had to clear
But to toss them down from such a
Height was not a good idea
The foreman wasn't very please, d
He is an awkward sod
He said I'd have to cart them
Down the ladders in me hod
Now shifting all those bricks by hand
It was so very slow so I hoisted up a barrel
And secured a rope below
But in me haste to do the job
I was too blind to see
That a barrel full of building
Bricks is heavier than me

And so when I untied the rope
The barrel fell like lead
And clinging tightly to the rope
I started up instead
I shot up like a rocket 'til to my dismay
I found that halfway up I met the
Bloody barrel coming down

Now the barrel broke me shoulder
As to the ground, it sped
And when I reached the top
I banged the pulley with me head
I clung on tightly
Numb with shock from this almighty blow
And the barrel spilled out half
The bricks fourteen floors below

Now when these bricks had fallen from
The barrel to the floor
I then outweighed the barrel and
So started down once more
Still clinging tightly to the rope
Me body wracked with pain halfway down
I met the bloody barrel once again

Now the force of this collision
Halfway down the office block
Caused multiple contusions and a
Nasty state of shock
Still clinging tightly to the rope
I fell toward the ground
And landed on the broken bricks
The barrel had scattered round

Well, I lay there groaning on the ground
I thought I'd passed the worst
But the barrel hit the pulley wheel
And then the bottom burst
A shower of bricks rained down on me
I didn't have a hope
For as I lay there bleeding
I let go the bloody rope
The barrel being unsecured
Then started down once more
And it landed right across me as
I lay there on the floor
It broke three ribs and my left
Arm and I can only say
That I hope you'll understand why
Murphy's not at work today