Ray Stevens - The Pirate Song lyrics

Sixteen men on a dead man's chestyo ho
Ho and a bottle of rum

(Captain) Avast there mates, ye're sailin'
With Long John Black Beard
Peg-Leg, Patch-Eye Hook, scourge of
The bounding main bloodthirstiest, black
Heartiest pirate captain ever sailed the
Seven seas, ha, ha
Ha! What say ye we hoist the Jolly Roger
Heel over the
Yonder Spanish galleon lay a few
Broadsides agin' her timers
Swing over on these here lanyards
With our cutlasses in our
Teeth cut 'em to ribbons and
Split the booty what say
Ye to that, me hearties? Heh! Ha, ha, ha
Ha!

(Twit) I don't like it

(Captain) You don't like it?

(Twit) I don't like it and I don't
Wanna do it it's tacky, tacky
Tackyand don't look at me that way

(Captain) Well, if you don't like it
What do you want?
Chorus I want to sing and dance
I want to sing and dance
I want to be a pirate
In the Pirates of Penzance
Wear me silver-buckled slippers and
Me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance

(Captain) You want to sing and dance, heh!
You don't like plundering, aye? Well
Shiver me timbers 'ow 'bout
Treasuring, huh? Rubies, emeralds and pearls
Gold doubloons and British
Sovereigns silver chalices encrusted with
Diamonds and jewels, necklaces and
Bracelets of every shape and size, fit
For the crown heads of Europe
Aye? And all buried in a
Pirate's chest and I just happen
To know where how
About that me bloodthirsty buckos
Heh? Ha, ha, ha!

(Twit) I don't like it

(Captain) You don't like it?

(Twit) I don't like it and I don't want it

(Captain) He don't want it

(Twit) And I won't do iti'm an artiste

(Captain) An artiste, well mister artiste
What do you want?

Chorus I want to sing and dance
I want to sing and dance
I want to be a pirate
In the Pirates of Penzance
Wear me silver-buckled slippers and
Me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance

(Captain) Now, listen hear! This ain't no
Floating Gilbert and Sullivan show
You know for some little flittin'
Tinkerbell this here be a
Black hearted pirate ship and
I would have you
Keel hauled if you weren't me
Own flesh and blood you little twit! So you
Don't like plunderin' aye?
(Twit) I don't like it

(Captain) And you don't want
No treasurin' ah?

(Twit) I don't want it

(Captain) And you probably don't
Want no groggin' and
Revelin' and wrenchin' and rummin'
Either I suppose?

(Twit) Well, deep downyou want to know
The truth? It's not me, i don't want it

(Captain) Well, what do you wantas if I
Didn't already bleein know?

(Twit) I want to sing and dance and

(Captain) I know
I knowand wear your tight little shiny pants
Huh! Okaywe'll all sing and dance
(pirates grumble) i said we'll
All sing and dance
(pirates grumble) or you'll walk the plank
One - two - free

(Chorus in pirates' voices)
Chorus I want to sing and dance
I want to sing and dance
I want to be a pirate
In the Pirates of Penzance
Wear me silver-buckled slippers and
Me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance

(Over chorus
You hear the Captain and twit's voice say)
(Twit) I like iti like it

(Captain) I kinda like it me own self
(Twit) Thought you would

Sixteen men on a dead man's chestyo ho
Ho and a bottle of rum

(Twit) I don't like rum

(Captain) You don't like rum?

(Twit) Well no, actuallywell
I might like a little Perrier

(Captain) A little Perrier?

(Twit) With a lime in it

(Captain) A lime in it? he wants a lime in it

(Twit) Well, do you have any Escargot?

(Captain) Escarwhat?

(Twit) What's the soup today?

(Captain) Soup!?

(Twit) Might have a bit of a salad too!

(Captain) Well
How about a bleeding fingerbowl?

(Twit) Maybe a croissant!is that right?
Those French make everything so
Hard! Why didn't they just call it a bun?

(fade out)