Rozz Dyliams - Half A Headstone lyrics

See, it's not that I don't have
The guts to do it
It's that I'm broke and I won't
Bring myself to go
To Walmart to buy the gun and bullet
I'm trying to go out like my
Cousin Manny dumb and foolish
With a shotgun to my face to
Rearrange it when I pull it
I want my family to discover me a couple
Hours later with my
Cranium practically decapitated
I'm gonna tape a note to the
Door to warn them in advance
That right after I stained the
Comforter I shit my pants
And on the other side A
List of demands I could
Have easily obtain if it wasn't
For the simplest fact
Agoraphobia something I've struggled
With ever since I was little
And could only briefly get over the hurdle
Never classy, only low or middle
With no escape from the mental rape that
I deal with on a daily basis
My uncle Jim knows too
Cause he took himself out before
I was even born
So I guess it just runs in the family
And I can't even think about
Anything more manly than putting
A barrel in your mouth and
Pulling the trigger gladly
If I was anyone other than who
I am I would understand
It's a waste to not find the humor in tragedy
All about depravity and honestlessness
And you can exploit
The death like friends of Eurynomos did
No emotions or empathy as my
Heart is solid as
A brick but overcrowded like
This metropolitan is
Fuck a job and a bitch I
Don't think I'm strong enough
Or I wasn't build for this
Or I haven't done it long enough
Or I don't even wanna do it, screw it
At least if I did it
It would give someone a
Part time remodeling gig i'm an obvious pig
Sexual pervert who's better off alone than
Mistreating someone who doesn't deserve it
High school dropout
I'm gonna dig in my throat with the pair
Of scissors and let my tricchia pop out
As long as it doesn't involve
Any type of medication i'm onto it
I'd rather try to hang myself again
In 2005 I did a number on my arm with
A utility knife that only
Caused minor bodily harm
One in the chamber, 30 seconds to lift off
I want it to be so bloody I'll have to
Seal my suicide note in a zip lock
I have another one on my arm that I have to
Put a bandage on for any
Sort of public function junction junction
I have this fantasy of putting
My head on the train
Tracks to make it explode just like a pumpkin
Fuck it, what's the point of changing the
Way you think about your
Surroundings if it's something you'll
Always be stuck with
Breathing in massive amounts of gas
Out of the oven so
I can follow the path of Sylvia Plath in 63
Ever since I could remember life was a joke
I even tried to hang myself but I was
Too fat so I broke the rope