Sandpeople - Anguish lyrics

I´ve been conditioned since before I
Denied being a christian
In denial, on trial, on fire
Entire worlds collapse with the
Weight of their words
Words can construct a sanctuary that
Changes in a day
In a way it makes sense, as dense images fade
And I take time forget the
Finer things in life
Despite not understanding this
Numbing sensation
I'll cave in probably before I prevail
I´ll excel past places others
Promised to fail success is subjective and
Dismantles the collective
As remedy is a raised duality, dueling
Ruining my blissful ignorance
Refueling my renaissance
I´m lost seeking to be found
Listening for sound


Wearing this crown facade proudly
The crowd be playing my insecurities
As I nervously ask you to murder me
It should have been an identity resurrection
With childhood memories I keep on forgetting
As this continues
Conditions prove to be contagious
As I am ethic and ethic has become anguish

Have you ever felt this way?
Or am I the only one?
Anguish has taken a place in my heart
And all I can do is run, away

Transform this child of the storm
This thorn has caught my
Sight without unveiling it'self
Unconditional love seems to have guidelines
Landmines places on an already narrow trail
Driven by desire to be driven
By the third nail
And somewhere on my walk I´m
Bound to pick myself up
But if you give me your
Hand I´ll be eternally grateful
Well as I human I have to
Trouble discerning what it distasteful
I´m playful when it comes to
Matters of live and death
First and last breath being
Taken and being left
With the ability to all truth
Into what I can accept
And I know lust better than I know respect
And I don’t cuss but that don’t
Make your mind darker than mine
I´ve seen the abyss and done
Things people would find
Strange to say the least
(deranged) feed the beast
I recently acquired a need to live in peace
As footprints in the sand speak
With the weight of words
I live in the hourglass
Struggling to be heard
And I have covered quiet land
In search of language
As I am ethic and ethic is anguish

Have you ever felt this way?
Or am I the only one?
Anguish has taken a place in my heart
And all I can do is run away

Isolated staring through an eyelid backdrop
I can´t stop considering where I´ll
Be in a few years, from today
With a new outlook on everything
That I one time maybe made a difference
As major turns into minor I get no resistance
I´m a terrible witness and need
Not fake being convinced
It´s gonna´ work out
Though I hold tight to the faith I have
Of always been one to take too
Much of a bad thing
I live in extremes and am not who I seem
A cry for help might not
Play out in traditional scenes
Hiding behind laughter, held up by plasma
Watch as I shatter right here on this track
What I´m speaking today I wish
I could take back
And act like there´s nothing
Compressing my brain pretend like I am happy
And only ethic remains
The fact is right now there´s
A lot to sort out
I´m swimming in doubt and surviving on hope
And I can live without an answer
Now if that what´s required
But I think this empire has been built
On the guilt of it's sire
Every construction is an order
From the ground level
A requiem for order, pierce me like metal
Blades of a wakening beginning is banished
As ethic slowly separates from his anguish

Have you ever felt this way
Or am I the only one?
Anguish has taken a place in my heart
And all I can do is run away