Slaine, ILL BILL - When the War Ends lyrics

Have you ever dug deep into
The trauma you faced as a kid
And seen how it creates
Where you basically is?
How you fight when you fuck and you leave
How you love or you hate all
Of what you perceive
Is all seen through the filter of fear
Shame, guilt, and despair
Palpable pain is felt in the air
It's still there from the belt and the chair
Try and squelch it to move forward
To maybe build and repair
It's too horrid when tomorrows
Are frozen in time with the mind trapped in
A self-loathing design
I try to shove it down
Leave it all closed up inside
See if you love me now
I can sell souls to the blind
Lost in the spiral of the
Mind like an addict can
Be mesmerized in the rhythm of a tragic dance
I guess I never had a chance
Now I'm looking back
Standing at the bottom of an avalanche

We never know what tomorrow brings
Try to be prepared for when sorrow sings
The Lord taketh and the Lord gives
Though I am still aching when the war ends

Thought I knew true truth
Didn't know truth at all
This shit was super false
I was a shooting star
Who knew that you could fall so
Far in the dirt again
To pull up my roots in awe
I had forgotten it all like I took Ruphenol
I had a game to win, fuck it
I shoot the ball numbing the pain again
A bucket or hoop to fall
Is all it took to get me
To another ooh and ah
I been through withdrawal
It becomes who you are
Ah, object of affection
I came, I conquered what gets your attention
Insane, I'm bonkers, my quest, my ascension
These rhymes I wrote on the desk in detention
Ah, troubled youth chugging juice
With the gin
In my Bubblegoose trynna blackout back then
Smoking PCP when the Summer come
Looking back
Wasn't just the cops I was running from
We never know what tomorrow brings
Try to be prepared for when sorrow sings
The Lord taketh and the Lord gives
Though I am still aching when the war ends

So I'm a prisoner
And I'm mind-warped on a plane ride
With the kamikaze pilot
We ain't on the same side
Living in a time warp
I'm still where the pain died
Brain tied in the same chains
That I'm hanged by everyday
I wake up the same with the strange vibe
Maybe I should stay inside watching paint dry
Even then, I can't write with the same drive
That I had when I was getting high
Is that the truth? Or a lie? yeah
The war never ends all my ruthless desires
We are forever friends
So I shoot for the skies
But it's more evident than it's ever been
That there's something killing me within
I keep keeping on, one foot in front
The other head up everywhere
That I'm stepping now
But when you're fighting all your life
Can't trust nobody tell me
When is it time to put the weapons down?

We never know what tomorrow brings
Try to be prepared for when sorrow sings
The Lord taketh and the Lord gives
Though I am still aching when the war ends