Steve Goodman - How Much Tequila (Did I Drink Last Night?) lyrics
[Steve Goodman - How Much Tequila Did I Drink Last Night? lyrics]
It's really anybody's guess
I poured them so fast
I couldn't keep them in the glass
But this morning I sure am a mess
My head is four or five
Times it's normal size
And I got this big old
Cactus stuck between my eyes
I can't recall a single thing I did or said
Or the names of all these
People sleeping in this bed
Tell me how, tell me how, tell me how
Tell me how tell me how much tequila did
I drink last night?
How did I get these cuts and
Bruises all over my body?
I must have fallen down somehow
Well, I believe it must have had
Something to do with karate
- it's all coming back to me now
I was standing in a bar
With King Kong's cousin
He must have been seven foot three
His elbow gave me a bump, and so I said "Hey
Chump
Would you like to step outside with me?"
Tell me how, tell me how, tell me how
Tell me how tell me how much tequila did
I drink last night?
My mouth is filled with cotton
And my brain is sore
I left last night's dinner
On this morning's floor
My belly is swollen and my eyeballs shrunk
I drank so much that my hair got drunk
I see a big old worm about ten feet long
Hallucinating purple cows
Somebody moved the furniture while I was gone
Uh oh, this is not my house
I could call us a taxi on the telephone
If I just knew where we are
I guess I'm gonna have to
Drive myself back home
As soon as I can find the car
Tell me how, tell me how, tell me how
Tell me how tell me how much tequila did
I drink last night?