Rustage, JT Music, Dan Bull, The Stupendium - Pictures of Spider-Man lyrics

Are we live? Good did you plug the book? No?
You're fired! Get out!
Now, let’s educate some people

Welcome back, thanks for joining me today
Here on Just the Facts with
Your friend J jonah J
This city's at a tipping point
It could go either way
But I'm not one to disappoint
I’ve got a lot to say about a hero
A man who loves this city like a son
Shooting through the air and
Looking out for everyone
Bringing hope and light and justice to
A city that had none and his name's J jonah
Jameson, you're welcome, let's move on
To a menace! A monster! A
Blight upon our streets! Of course
I am referring to that spider donning freak
Don't let him fool you, no, it's not quiet
It's not peaceful
It's a disaster on the brink
So wake up and listen, people!
There’s an evil hiding out there
Anyone could be that web slinger
Trust me, I once hired a guy the height
He was a dead ringer
Yes, Spider-Man again! He needs
Arrest with no parole
This guy’s shenanigans require a
Little pest control


That's all, so tune in again
We got the news and the views
On which you can depend and if you see him
You can login and send in all your pictures
Pictures of Spider-Man
Our city has a way of life to defend
So we’re here to tell your
Neighbourhood he isn't your friend
If you see a hero
You should really amend your picture
Picture of Spider-Man

I hate to say it
But we can't ignore the failures
Our city's top committees won’t
Investigate his alias
Sure, Fisk is out the picture
But a hundred mile radius
Of thugs and goons and hooligans will
Make the public pay for it
Who are we to say that
Our city should be trusted
To the flavour of the
Day dispensing Daredevil justice?
The next crazy caped crusader out
To punish folks for fun?
It's unthinkable! When we've already got
A force we've funded the fact is, folks
Your taxes don't do jack for stopping crimes
Now they're spent to fix the messes
That these loonies leave behind
Full confession, yes, the Scorpion, well
He is one of mine
But was all in good intention
That he went and undermined
We need an Iron Fist
Some discipline to set things right
A weak slap on the wrist won't
Keep you safe on misty nights
I'm sure every cop for miles
Morale is out of sight
As our force is forced to watch
While spandex psychos fight the fight
So we ship ‘em off to prison
When they level blocks in battle
On some package cruise for villains
Plunging public funds for travel
Sure, they may look caged, but the truth is
We're just saddled
So I ask you listeners, now
We've bought the raft, where's the paddle?


That's all, so tune in again
We got the news and the views
On which you can depend if you see him
You can login and send in all your pictures
Pictures of Spider-Man
This super nuisance screws up
More than he mends
So maybe you should view him
Through an alternate lens
We're horrified at all of the
Positive comments on your pictures
Pictures of Spider-Man

Speak for yourself
I've seen Spidey protect this city
Last Monday, I got jumped
And mugged, trust me
They could've killed me
When suddenly this muscular stud
In the tightest suit saved me first
Gave me my purse and strung the
Thugs up by their boots

We'll now that's a lovely story
But did you not deduce?
That maybe Spider-Man and all those
Thugs are in cahoots?
Wait, did you just say "cahoots"?
Yes I did, and it's the truth!
With that spider on our ceilings violent
Crime is through the roof! NEXT!

Uh, hello? Hi, is this the right number?
Of that blathering idiot
Spitting, belittling heroes and
Making me wonder
Did you not see the bank heist?
Spider-Man knocked out his lights!
I can't believe you have the nerve to
Mock those who do what's right


Yes, the bank was already in trouble
Then the spider shows up for the scuffle
Might he have taken the fight outside ‘stead
Of crushing the lobby to rubble?
Stopping a robbery?
Or was he just showing off at the
Cost of the jobs and the property?
Dropped all that concrete on
Top of the robber
And still didn't bother to
Finish him properly! NEXT!

Yeah, hi, I'm just trying to find out
Why you're so riled up half of the time now
Couldn't you present a better argument
If you were calm instead
Of getting farther into
A belligerent position in which
Refusing to listen to listeners' differing
Views is the thing that
You're choosing to do?
Even when they've just proven the truth
You just interrupt-

Another caller tries tell me how to do my job
When I holler it's not out of anger, no
It's out of love!
For this city! For it's people!
But if you just think I'm ticked off
Turn over to that hero-loving
Hellcat hosting Trish Talk

That's all, so tune in again
We got the news and the views
On which you can depend if you see him
You can login and send in all your pictures
Pictures of Spider-Man
If you're delusional, then you can pretend
That our city isn't victim
Of a dangerous trend
But if you've been afflicted
Then of course, you can send your pictures
Pictures of Spider-Man

Non lethal? That's just fine!
He just hung them up in a bundle of twine
‘Til our city's window cleaners find
Them ten floors up in ten months time
But what's a few corpses glued onto roofs?
When his YouTube movies get
Millions of views?
That the hoodlum puts on a mask just proves
That he's not paying tax on the ad revenue
The fact is this the impact
Of this damned arachnid
Can be tracked back to the day that he landed
Donned a mask and the bad guys adapted
Menageries of mad-men he manufactured
This hack is the last thing we need
Now sentient sand and Nazi bees!?
Lizards, wizards, can't we see?
That spider's like a damned disease!
Call me traditional, I do things by the book
But if you like the truth, my friend, well
You can buy the book!
Violence shook and sides were took
Yet some would let them off the hook
I guess I shouldn't be surprised
That sheep will follow crooks
You're left with vigilantes when you
Let crime get away
So when will Spider-Man see that the
Freaks have had their day?
If it were up to me, folks
If I truly had my way
I'd simply snap my fingers and
They'd all just go away

You, you still here? Good you're rehired
Get me a coffee and the fire yourself again
Amateurs