Aurelio Voltaire - Poopin on the Enterprise (a Monologue) lyrics

Anybody here a Star Trek fan?
I love Star Trek so much
But man they sure make some
Shit up on that show
It's just unbelievable to me
They're like bouncing graviton beams off
The main deflector array
They're like creating rifts in
The timespace continuum
And yet, and yet not one
Toilet on the entire Enterprise, Not one
Do these people not poop?
Like in forty years of Star Trek no one has
Ever said: "Shit I gotta
Go to the bathroom"
What I wouldn't give to see that
One episode: The Poop Episode

I imagine it would be something like this
You know like the Klingons
Are attacking and Picard's on the
Bridge and he's like: "Worf
You're needed on the bridge!"
"I can't come to the
Bridge right now captain"
"Worf, that's insubordination
I need you up here immediately!"
"I'm in the latrine captain"
"Oh dear me, I'm sorry
Well you know get up here
As soon as you can"
And then of course you know
Riker's gotta waddle over:
"Did you ask him if it was a
Number one or a number two?"
"Dear God I! No I did not ask him if it was
A- worf is it a number one or a number two?"
"It's a number two! Arg
Sword of Kahless! It's got
It's got ridges! Arg
Perhaps today is a good day to die!"
This turd has no honor