Baba Brinkman - Artificial Selection lyrics

Artificial selection
It starts with a question
How did people ever get cows
Chickens and pigs
And other animals and plants
To act so domestic?
We took them from the wild and we bred them
Brethren

Welcome to the Charles Darwin Bicentennial
So, why does everybody think this
Guy is so special? Maybe because a man was
Born two centuries ago
Who, as far as anyone knows, was the first
To recognize the underlying pattern
Behind the pageant
Affectionately known as "life on this planet"
He was the first to understand it
The first to translate his amazement
At the wonder of life
Into a way to explain it


So this is a celebration
Of Darwin’s greatness in the form of a rap –
Some would say "a debasement"
I would say "be patient"
Just think of this as
A manifestation of the evolutionary equation
A recapitulation of life, a re-enactment
So, how do you go from amoebas to rappers?
You open The Origin of Species
And you read it's chapters
The first chapter is about the
Impact of people’s actions
On farm animals, pets, and domestic crops
Where did they come from?
From original stocks
Of wild animals and plants
Which were selected and crossed
For the best properties
And thus became the effect of their cause
But of course
Not every selection was conscious
Still, even if breeders in ancient
Egypt couldn’t see this
And had no idea how to rework the features
Of a species of sheep
Or increase the sweetness
Of their peaches every season
When they chose to seed it
Or to feed it or to breed it or
To weed it out and delete it
‘Cause they didn’t see it as needed
Whether the preferences in question
Were for bigger chicken breasts or
Whippets with a thinner mid-section
Or if it was just an inner
Predilection to pick the best in
Any mixed collection
That’s artificial selection

But there’s nothing artificial
About domestication
Ant colonies keep domestic aphids
It’s just an arrangement where one
Hand washes the other we protect the cow
And the cow offers the udder
And even if there’s never
A conscious discussion
If our little selections
And little preferences
Can change and enhance
The critical differences
Between wild and domestic breeds
Over the centuries
Then maybe that can explain… everything
In nature it isn’t us
That makes the selections
It’s just survival and reproduction in
The midst of competition
Where slight differences that arise randomly
Get selected by the
Pressures applied environmentally
And eventually species divide like
A family tree into everything alive
From a fly to a manatee
So how does this apply to
The craft of the MC?
Well, variation can be found in
The styles on display
Rappers all have different techniques
When they’re on stage
And the results can be seen
In the audience’s face
Like, for instance, at this moment
You all look amazed
Like guppies removed abruptly from
Their aquatic space
Your minds are probably racing over
Questions of style and race
And genre and time and place
And some of your eyes are glazed
Like "For God’s sake
How long will this take?!"
But, if you all feel that way
Then soon I’ll be replaced
By someone more entertaining
Like maybe Lil Wayne
This is the rap version of
The doctrine of Malthus
It’s the proportion of hungry mouths
To food resources in the
Form of captive audiences
Where crowds of two or more will always
Be at least half as common as performers
Can you see the mathematical problem?
But survival on stage is a non random process
‘Cause those who get massive
Responses tend to influence
Those who aspire to get massive responses
So if you say I sound
Like, for instance, Eminem, then I’ll say
"That’s preposterous!" But
If you catch me grabbing my crotch
And acting obnoxious
Then I might have to acknowledge
That this is a form of
Imitation modified by experience
Which is similar to the
Genetic basis of inheritance
Except it’s part Darwinism and part Lamarkism
With genes and culture co-evolving as
We rock to the rhythm
But whether you think cultures really evolve
Or if it’s just a silly
Metaphor that’s pretty but false
Or whether you’ve never even
Thought about that
I still think Darwin can teach
Us a lot about rap
And vice verse ‘cause it’s all about that
Competition for status with
Intricate language delivered in battles
And it’s all about getting that
Fitness advantage and the different
Adaptive behaviour patterns
That have us acting crazier
Than capercaillie mating dances
But hey that’s natural selection so
Just sit back and listen
And witness the evolution of
The rap profession