Dan Bull - I'm Going to Be a Daddy lyrics

When she showed me the pregnancy
Test I felt numb
I thought these things were supposed
To tell the facts
Howcome we got this outcome?
They're meant to be ninety-nine
Point nine percent accurate
But now I doubt them
I thought maybe one day I may want a baby
But not here, not now, what, are you crazy?
It's too soon I'm too stupid
To build a human nest
I'm a man child hiding in the
Shadow of my student debts
We always used protection
At least to my recollection
Well, i guess this is another
New regret for my collection
And I won't kill a fetus
Even if it's milimetres
If I'm big enough to spill a seed
Then i'm big enough to let it breathe
A fellow creature
Full of genes with each of us
We're big enough to bring it up
And let it develop features left speechless
But my ears hurt even when I hear tiny noises
How am I going to deal with
Each night of crying high-pitched voices?
When they're in pain there's no way
To make them say it softly
I'm good with kids
As long as someone can take them off me
And what'll remain of our
Relationship that's already strained?
The love that's left it's drained and
Plumbed into a baby's veins
And what if this isn't the
Right relationship to stay with?
At this stage in the day it may
Just be to late to change it

I'm going to be a daddy
And I'm fucking terrified
I'm gonna throw up and there's
Nowhere I can ever hide i want to stop
I want to wake up and get off this ride
I'm going to be a daddy
And I'm fucking terrified

My life is rather good
It's no time for fatherhood
Looking at the cats it's hard enough
I can't give up my livelihood
I can't be a role model
My own soul's swaddled
My train of thought's like a
Pram rolling on old cobbles
How can I change the habit of a lifetime?
I'm a lazy chappy change that?
I've never had to change a baby's nappy
Don't want to watch the Tweenies on the TV
I like cult classic black and white cinema
Fuck CBeebies i don't have a choice anymore
I don't have a voice anymore
Can't make noise anymore
I can't have a bottle of brandy and
A LAN party with the boys anymore
The way I want to steer the ship and
The way it heads is all different
The game of life is flipped from single
Player to a co-op escort mission
How can I provide enough safety and security?
When it feels like it's the whole
World versus her and me?
Poland versus Germany east versus West
Earth eating it'self while I've invited
You to be it's guest
What can I bring to the table?
I'm not mentally stable
But they say parenting's innate and we're
All meant to be able
But what if it's ill, what if it's disabled
What if it's not mine? What if it dies
What if it grows up to
Be a horrible little gobshite?
What if it hates me? What if
It's not just one kid?
What if it listens to this
Song and feels unwanted?

I'm going to be a daddy
And I'm fucking terrified
I'm gonna throw up and there's
Nowhere i can ever hide i want to stop
I want to wake up and get off this ride
I'm going to be a daddy
And I'm fucking terrified

I hope I can be helpful during the birth
Providing backup for the mother of the
Youngest of the children of earth
When it's eighteen, I'll be forty-eight
When it's forty-eight, I'll be seventy-eight
And when it's seventy-eight
I should be dead in the grave
Or in my place waiting at the heavenly gate
Every day a memory fades except
For some strange cases
Like when I'm travelling back to the past
And wondering wether to change places
When she showed me the pregnancy test
I felt numb but now I've settled down
I've got one message: Welcome

I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy
I'm going to be a daddy