Dan Bull - Republican Rap Battle lyrics

Ladies and gentlemen
I'd like to welcome you today
To the brand new format Republican debate
In a desperate attempt to
Increase the ratings
We're making the candidates rap
When they say things

Bring it bitch, I'm Newt Gingrich
I want to rob the poor and then
Give it to the stinking rich
I'll make your sphincter itch
Pain in the asshole
Economically the opposite of Castro

I'm Ron Paul
My following's devout as John Paul
The one all the libertarians have longed for
I want small government, no taxation
And my tracks played on
Every radio rap station

Who twists lyrics like a Rubik's Cube?
It's Mitt Romney, repping Massachussets
You pricks
People ask me what to do with the gays
I say send them away to Guantanamo Bay

I look like someone from a
Star Trek fan forum
What's my name, bitch? It's Rick Santorum
My shit's damn boring and I'm homophobic too
Except I believe that homos should
Go into a zoo

I'm slick Rick Perry
The Texas state governor
A southener Republican motherfucker
That's coming to fuck up enemies
With the death penalty
If they're mentally retarded don't
Bother telling me i don't give a fuck