Ethel Cain - Head in the Wall lyrics

Sometimes you make me wanna put my
Fucking head through the wall
Sometimes I wonder if I even know you at all
Fall asleep to the sound of
Your old rotating fan
I cut the fuck out of myself and
Soaked the bed sheets with blood again

I hold my head underwater just
To drown out the noise it's always my fault
Girls will be bitches and boys will be boys
I know I don’t need you
But I'm terrified of letting you go
Even after all the times you fucked the shit
Out of me while I was crying "No"

And how am I supposed to feel good about
Myself when everything I do is wrong?
When I’m just an ugly bitch, a fucking freak
And I don’t wanna go on?
And I don’t wanna leave my house 'cause
I know everybody’s staring at me now
"Why the hell am I alive?"
Is what they think, they wanna take me down

And I can’t get out, can’t run away
There’s no escaping you now
(There's no escaping you now)
I’m gonna die all alone next to you
In this piece of shit town
And we’ve been cursed since the
Start, Jesus didn’t want us, no
And you take all of your sins out
On my body like everyone else does
Shooting up our old school when we
Get bored of shooting up
And fuck the cops, and fuck God
And fuck this town for ruining us
And they’ll put holes in all we
Own and in our heads, pumped full of lead
You always told me I could only
Leave you once we’re both dead

Sometimes you make wanna put my
Fucking head through the wall
Sometimes I wonder if I ever
Even knew you at all