Insane Clown Posse - Hellalujah (Early Mix) lyrics

"Give God the first portion of your income
Say that with me
Give God the first portion of
Your income give it first!
Not after deducts, not after
The social security, and the
Hospitilization, and the malnutrition not
After all these
Things on your check you say
I'm gonna give God a little what's
Left you do
And that's what you gonna get from God"

Who am I? I'm not the Devil
I can take you to my level
Above the rocks, above the earth
Tell me what your soul is worth
How much money do you make?
How much will you let me take?
I will give you tranquilty
Just send your welfare checks to me


Life is going to expire
And your soul will burn in fire
You will perish in the thunder
Unless you call my hotline number
God has asked you to make me rich
Me and my fat-whack gaudy bitch
On your TV's late at night
Send those checks and I'll guide
You to the light

"Yes my children you must give to
The lord! You must give
To the church! You must give
To me! Brothers and Sisters" (shouted, hey)
"Remember as you're signing those
Checks you're signing your
Passport to the pearly gates of Heaven!"
(Send your checks, don't mail without it
Hey) "You have to pay admission into Heaven
And I am the cashier! Come
Hurry! For Heaven is almost full!"
(Burn in Hell if you're without it, hey)
"And only a sinner would get shut out!"
(Promise God is all about it)

Buddha called me and then stopped by
And he told me you're gonna die
Unless you buy my holy water
Check, cash, or a money order
This is true, don't question me
I'll even send you shit for free
It's only ten bucks for the call
And I'll send a prayer, no charge at all
Put your lips up to the screen
Close your eyelids and intervene
Your lips to mine, now send the cash
And while you're there, you can kiss my ass
Take your paycheck and send me half
And I'll send you God's autograph
I'll get Allah's and Buddha's too
Even Zeus, I don't give a fuck who
Just send me that money

"The more cash you give to the church now
The better seats you have in Heaven!
(shouted, hey)
Make your reservations now! As the rest of
The world is burning in Hellfire
(Send your checks, don't mail without it
Hey) you will be in Heaven
Drivin' a Cadillac sedan
Sippin' on Grandma's lemonade
(Burn in Hell if you're without it, hey)
Pay the money now and secure your spot!"
(Promise God is all about it)

Pass the collection plate
(show-show me how you give)
Pass the collection plate
(g-give-give, how to live)
Pass the collection plate
(show-show-show me how you give)
Pass the collection plate
(show me how you give
I'll tell you how to live)

Your total's twenty-two eleven
For your set of keys to heaven
Make the checks out in my name
Me or God, it's all the same
Bring your crippled ass to me
Pay my usher the holy fee
I'll bless your legs and bless your chair
Then wheel your bitch-ass outta here
Now a special ceremony
This part don't cost any money
Drip a drop of blessed water
Now I fertilize your daughter
Even though I fucked a hooker
Took your baby girl and shook her
You still buy everything I sell
And I'm living well see you in Hell!
"You've already spent your money
On material things
Fear not! God will forgive you
(shouted, hey) just bring those evil items
Right to my church
(Send your checks, don't mail without it
Hey) bring the jewelry, the cameras
The television sets, the VCR
(Burn in Hell if you're without it, hey)
Get in your cars right now
Drive up and leave your keys with me
(Promise God is all about it)
I can assure you it will all be
Waiting for you in glorious Heaven hallelujah
(Pass the collection plate, shouted, hey)
If you've been tarnished by the Devil's
Ways cleanse your soul now
(Pass the collection plate, Send your
Checks, don't mail without it, hey)
Bring your bottled nectar, your marijuana
Your cocaine crack rocks, bring them to me!
(Pass the collection plate, Burn in
Hell if you're without it, hey)
For I am your savior, Hallelujah!
(Pass the collection plate
Promise God is all about it)
Hallelujah! You dumb motherfuckers"