Insane Clown Posse - The Neden Game lyrics

"Let's meet contestant number one
He's a schizophrenic
Serial killer clown who says women love
His sexy smile let's find out if his
Charm will work on Sharon sharon
What's your question?"

"Contestant number one
I believe first impressions last forever
So let's say you were
To come over to my parent's house and have
Dinner with me and my family tell me what you
Would do to make that
First impression really stick"

Let's see, mm, well
I'd have to think about it
I might show up in a tux, HA!, but I doubt it
I'd probably just show up naked
Like I always do
And look your momma in the eye and tell her
"FUCK YOU!" hurry up, bitch, I'm hungry
I smell spaghetti
I'd pinch her loopy ass and tell her
"Get the food ready!"
Your dad will probably start trippin'
And get me pissed
I'd have to walk up and bust
Him in his fucking lips! It's dinner time
We hearing grace from your mother
I'd pull a forty out and pour
Some for your little brother
I'm steady staring at your sister
I'll tell you this
You know for only thirteen
She got some big tit's
After that, your dad will try to jump again
And only this time
I'd put the forty to his chin
After your mom does the
Dishes and the silverware
I'd dry-fuck her till I nut in my underwear

"Now, let's meet contestant number two
He's a psychopathic, deranged
Crackhead freak who works
For the Dark Carnival he says women
Call him Stretch Nuts sharon
Let's hear your question"

"I like a man who's not afraid
To show his true emotions, a
Man who expresses himself in his
Own special way number two
If you fell in love with me Exactly
How would you let me know?"

First thing, I could never love you
You sound like a richie-bitch, yo, FUCK YOU!
But if I did
I'd probably show you that I care
By taking all these other
Motherfuckers outta here
I'd go through your phone book
And whack em all
And find contestant number one and
Break his fucking jaw (What?)
Anyone who looked at you, would have to pay
I'd be blowing fucking nuggets off all day
I'd grab your titties and stretch
'em down past your waist let 'em go
And watch 'em both spring up in your face
I'd sing love songs to you, the best I can
Get you naked, and hit it like a CAVEMAN!
Then we'd go to the beach
And walk through the sand
I'd throw a little in your face and say
I'm just playin'
As you spit it all out, I'd rub your back
And grab your underwear and wedge
It up your ass crack!

"Well it sounds like contestant number
Two is just over-flowing with
Sensitivity, Sharon it's a tough
Choice so far! Sharon
Let's have your last question and
See which one is
Going to win the rights to your neden"

"Okay, if we were at a dance club
And you both noticed me at
The same time tell me, how would
You each get my attention
And what would your pick up line be?"
(Well) "Whoever's the smoothest wins!"

Okay, first I'd slide up to the bar
And tell you that I can't believe
How fucking fat you are
I'd tell you that I like the
Way you make your titties shake
And if you lost a little weight
You'd look like Ricki Lake
Fuck that, you'd be jocking me quick
I'd order you a drink and
Stir it with my dick
And then to get your attention
In the crowded place
I'd simply walk up and stick
My nuts in your face
Yeah, freak her with your nuts, yo
That'll get her
Tell her that's she fat, yeah
That'll work even better
Look, fuck you, I got a strong rap
Shit, you don't want contestant number
Two he's mad wack
I walked into a barn and there he was
Standing up on a bucket, eww
Trying to fuck it
It was a big fucking smelly-ass farm llama
Damn dawg! How you gonna diss your momma?!