Jerry Reed, Dolly Parton - She Got The Goldmine (I Got The Shaft) lyrics

Boys this is your national anthem, okay

I guess it was back in '63
When eatin' my cookin' got the better of me
And I asked this little girl I was
Goin' with to be my wife

She said she would so I said "I do"
But I'da said "I wouldn't" if I'da just knew
How sayin' "I do" was gonna screw
Up all of my life

Now the first few years weren't all that bad
I'll never forget the good times we had
Cause I'm reminded every month when I
Send her the child support

And it wasn't too long 'til the lust all died
And I'll admit I wasn't too surprised
The day I come home and found my
Suitcase sittin' out on the porch



Well I tried to get in
And she changed the lock
And I seen this note on the mailbox that said
"So long turkey my attorney will be in touch"

Well, I decided right then and there
I was gonna be a nice guy
And give her her fair share
Just didn't know her share was
Gonna be quite that much

Well she got the goldmine
(She got the goldmine)
I got the shaft (I got the shaft)
They said they're splittin' it
All down the middle
But she got the better half
That all sounds sorta funny
But it hurts too much to laugh
She got the goldmine, I got the shaft

Now listen boys, you ain't heard nothin' yet
They give her the color television set
Then they give her the house
And the kids and both of the cars

Next, they start talkin' about
Child support and alimony
And the cost of the court
It didn't take me long to see how
Far in the toilet I really was

And I'm tellin' you that they
Have made a mistake
Because it adds up to more than I make
And everything I got worth
Havin' they've already took

While she's livin' like a queen on alimony
I'm workin' two jobs eatin' baloney
Askin' myself
"Why didn't you just learn how to cook?"

Well she got the goldmine
(She got the goldmine)
And I got the shaft (I got the shaft)
They said they were splittin' it
All down the middle
But she got the better half
That all sounds mighty funny
But it hurts too much to laugh
She got the goldmine and I got the shaft

Wait a minute timeout, timeout
Nah wait a minute listen I want you to know
That that's your side
What are you doing here?
We girls know that there's another
Side to this story right?
I'm gonna tell my tale

Okay, so I got the house
Where the floorboards creak
And a porch that sags and the beams are weak
And a roof that leaks like
A faucet when it rains

Yeah and that color TV gets nothin' but snow
And the cars won't move without a tow
And I shoulda had him towed away
If I had any brains
He's got no compassion, not even an ounce
Oh he might send a check
But I watch it bounce
And I know my alimony is lookin' mighty grim

Still I can take all that without any fear
If I didn't have to see his face around here
But them kids he left me Lord
They're the spittin' image of him

You call that a goldmine?
(You got the goldmine)
I call that a shaft (I get the shaft)
Now I shoulda split him right
Down the middle What?
His so called better half
Yeah it might be kinda funny but
It hurts to much to laugh
You call that a goldmine, I call it the shaft

Now you've heard her side
And you've heard mine
Now evidentially somebodies lyin'
Now I ask you ain't this an honest face?

Well, she got the goldmine
(She got the goldmine)
And I got the shaft (I got the shaft)
They said they were splittin' it
All down the middle
Yeah but you got the better half
It all sounds mighty funny
Yeah but it hurts too much to laugh
You got the goldmine and I got the shaft
I said you got the goldmine
And I got the shaft

What goldmine?