La Dispute - YOU ASCENDANT lyrics

I had visions of you wandering alone
Daylight burst against
Printed flowers on your dress

And the sun in your hair silver white

I watched you walk
Purposefully along the shoulder
Of the highway
Indifferent to traffic and it to you
As if neither existed
Alone there like all of us

And the summer colors shone
Bright open fields of goldenrod
The sky soft stone sapphire and selenite
Agate blue lace

Pale white bone in brush
All things to dust return but you keep on

Heading westward quick down Fulton Street
As if a thing beyond compelled
You walk now there
And you could not take your eyes away from it

And I could not either

And quickening your pace
Walking in the wind blown
Backwards toward home
Your face expressionless
You stopped suddenly still as carved stone
Waiting for the world to catch up
And I watched you in awe always
Even in dreams you raised your arms
Cross-shaped like a monument
Feigning permanence there
Denying her death and yours
And traffic stopped to watch
I knew you'd leave then
Ascending heavenward to breathe
Never in panic again peace for you
Forever somewhere

I carried on in my visions
Tired and lost for years this way
Only half aware of the light
Shining against the dark bright until we die

When I die let me do so beside you
When we die let us go at the same time

When the end comes will we see
Bright lights burst through the evergreens?
Feel the blown sand at our ankles or
Hear rustling needles in the breeze?

Who can know?
If we could choose the way we leave
Fill out circles on a ballot sheet
Vote the way we'll go
How the noise will cease
Finally and forever for us both
What would we do? How would we go?
Would we pass out in
Barracks beneath bedsheets
Brand new sneakers on our feet
Two by two into a comet
Tail peacefully to sleep forever dream?

When will we leave?

Will we all just disappear?
Or can we be hung up in a gallery
Displayed permanently forever with family
Painted in frames? Variations on a theme

How will we leave? Cut in threes?
Displayed in glass cases?
Death in the mind of living things?

Can it be quietly?
Like in the morning drinking
Coffee with the sunrise
Through the lilies in the window of
Our bedroom to the garden
Or just drift off watching TV
6: 30 in the evening
Never see it coming at all
Or can we live forever here
Be buried in our best memories
Drunk beside that drainage ditch
Road trip east of Denver
The prison in periphery
Life too beautiful too
Sweet despite everything
Could we choose to stay forever there
And never leave?
How long do I have to fix this?
Years lost too indifferent and afraid
While you burst to earth around
Me like lightning at night
How'd I miss a thing so bright?
And where does the shame go
Now if never away? No one to blame but me
I wanted everything how'd I fail so badly?

I have visions of you wandering
Alone down every city street
Light shaded everything at once
And flowers burst against your knees

And you asked for me to leave

Graceful in your sprinting now
Through all wind
Your skin pale silver lightning the
Seasons of your grief but, you are free now

And you asked for me to leave

I love you deeply then and now as ever
Never waver once again at
All, in any timeline, i will bend them all
To find you back to breathe
And you asked for me to leave

I will rend you from those dreams
Release the flowers in the street
Burn the monuments in plywood
And ascend there to be everything you need
I will be everything you need
I will be everything you need
I will be everything you need