Nana Grizol - We Carry The Feeling lyrics

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I waited all night but I was fast asleep when
It knocked upon my door
It gets lonely here when it's just
Me and my questions
Jetsam in the ether, pulsar's pull not
Drawing anymore

I remember it like yesterday
I thought you were lovely I just
Didn’t know what to say
There’s all these protocols that
Get in the way

We were on the edge of seventeen
All we knew to say were things we didn’t mean
I still impressed you with my wit it seemed
I learned so much from
Magazines and television
About how men relate through rules
To tell them how
Oh, I saw the signals with precision
The moments when our habit's faltered
Omens of desire unaltered

It wasn’t long ’til we were sharing beds
With different dressings on the dreams
Appearing in our heads
I wanted a lover you a brother instead

Either way these things were hard to name
Never quite knowing did we feel the same
After a while all I could feel was shame

Stef she said I shouldn’t see you anymore
Clyde they tried to call me
On the phone to say
Some loves are labors lost oh
But I’m never sure
There’s nothing they could tell
Me that made me ever really want to be alone

And I felt a funny face
Was a worthless waste
Caught a hopeless case
For sweet boys on sweaty days
Don’t know what we craved
It remains unspoken
The longing outlived the place
Our artistic taste
It outlived the clothes we wore
When I feel uncertain now
I remember how we carry the feeling

But those were stories that we saved for dark
That lost the plot before they'd even start
Except once when we were drunk and
Then you kissed me hard
And so I faded to a distant star
In the brightest company but
Everything was so far
Thinking lifetimes pass us, gaseous
Things just stay as they are

I tried to chalk it up to expectation
Or believe that what I wanted was just wrong
But now I better understand assimilation
I closed ranks among the ones who felt I
Only part-belonged among them

And I felt a funny face
Was a worthless waste
Caught a hopeless case
For sweet boys on sweaty days
Don’t know what we craved
It remains unspoken
The longing outlived the place
Our artistic taste
It outlived the clothes we wore
When I feel uncertain now
I remember how we carry the feeling