NOFX - Three String Guitar lyrics

I got two arthritic legs
I got five tuning pegs
I’ve got a bike that chain that
I turned into a strap
I can’t remember the songs that
I wrote last week yeah I’ve got that

I got thirty seven notes
And hundreds of used up famous quotes
And clichés on the wall
My songs are like trees in the forest
No one hears them fall
There are so many things
I can do with just three strings
Still nothing gets dropped into the hat
I don’t steal melodies
And sometimes just change keys
Song masturbation, yeah I’ve got that

But all I need is two
To write better songs than you