Sangu X - Mansion lyrics

Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
(slept in)
Broken legs but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I’m trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Yo, my mind is a house
With walls covered in lyrics
They're all over the place
There’s songs in the mirrors written
All over the floors, all over the chairs
And you get the uncut version of
Life when I go downstairs
That's where I write when I'm in a
Bad place and need to release
And let out the version of SX
You don't want to see
I put holes in the walls with both
Of my fists 'til they bleed
You might get a glimpse of how I
Cope with all this anger in me
Physically abused
Now that's the room that I
Don't want to be in
That picture ain't blurry at all
I just don’t want to see it
And these walls ain’t blank
I just think I don't want to see ’em
But why not? I'm in here
So I might as well read 'em
I gotta thank you for this
Anger that I carry around
Wish I could take a match and burn
This whole room to the ground
Matter of fact I think I'ma
Burn this room right now
So now this memory for some
Reason just won’t come down
You used to put me in the corner
So you could see the fear in my eyes
Then took me downstairs and beat me
'til I screamed and I cried
Congratulations, you'll always have a
Room in my mind but, I'ma keep the door shut
And lock the lyrics inside
Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
(slept in) and slept in
Broken legs but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Inside this mansion yo my mind is a house
With walls covered in pain
See, my problem is I don't fix things
I just try to repaint
Cover em up, like it never happened
Say I wish I could change, are you confused?
Come upstairs and I'll show you what I mean
This room's full of regrets
Just keeps getting fuller it seems
The moment I walk in to it is
The same moment that I wanna leave
I get sick to my stomach every
Time I look at these things
But, it's hard to look past when this
Is the room where I sleep i look around
One of the worst things I
Wrote on these walls
Was the moment I realized that
I was losing my grandma
And one of the first things I wrote
Was I wish I would have called
But, I should just stop now
We ain't got enough room in this song
And I regret the fact that I struggled
Trying to find who I am
And I lie to myself and say I
Do the best that I can
Shrug it off like it ain't nothing
Like it's out of my hands
Then get ticked off whenever I
See it affecting my plans
And I regret watching these trust
Issues eat me alive
And at the rate I'm going they'll probably
Still be there when I die
Congratulations, you'll always have a
Room in my mind the question is
Will I ever clean the walls off in time?
Insidious is blind inception
What's reality with all these questions?
Feels like I missed my alarm and slept in
(slept in) and slept in
Broken legs but I chase perfection
These walls are my blank expression
My mind is a home I'm trapped in
And it's lonely inside this mansion
Inside this mansion
So this part of my house
No one's been in it for years
I built the safe room and I
Don't let no one in there 'Cause if I do
There's a chance that they might
Disappear and not come back
And I admit I am emotionally
Scared to let anyone inside
So I just leave my doors locked
You might get other doors to open
Up but this door's not
'Cause, I don't want you to have
The opportunity to hurt me
And I'll be the only person that I
Can blame when you desert me
I'm barricaded inside so stop watching
I'm not coming to the door so stop knocking
Stop knocking i'm trapped here
God keeps saying I'm not locked in
I chose this, I am lost in my own conscience
I know that shutting the wall
Down ain't solving the problem
But, I didn't build this house because
I thought it would solve 'em
I built it because I thought that
It was safer in there but, it's not
I'm not the only thing that's living in here
Fear came to my house years ago, I let him in
Maybe that's the problem 'cause I've been
Dealing with this ever since
I thought that he would leave
But it's obvious he never did
He must have picked the room and
Got comfortable and settled in
Now I'm in the position it's either
Sit here and let him win
Or put him back outside where he came from
But I never can
'Cause in order to do that I'd
Have to open the doors
Is that me or the fear talking?
I don't know anymore
Lonely (lonely) it's lonely
Oh yeah, it's lonely inside this mansion