Dan Bull, The Stupendium - Stupendium Merchandise Rap lyrics

Welcome to the Stupendium
Home Shopping Network! Your one stop shop-

Everyday, I imagine a future where
I could look this good
You could have the ladies saying "okie
Dokie" in this stylish ensemble
Don't leave them hanging boy!

Go directly to fabulous!
Make every night 'Games Night'
With this colorful getup! Heave ho!
You won't need a Shelter from
The Storm in this coat!

You'll be top of a class in this!

Cocktail coates are a freeze!

Would you like to by my merchandise?
It's rather nice
In a range of size for a decent price

It's my merchandise, it's rather nice!
So improve your life
For low, low price of my merch

Well the channel's been accelerating lately
With hundreds of you subbing on the daily
I couldn't be more grateful
It's honestly amazing
And a whole bunch of you
Asked me to create these
Rather tasteful face tees
Well it's kinda crazy
To think you'd like my stuff enough
That you would pay me to help support all of
The content I'm creating
So let's explore the catalog
Of products I'm curating
Let's start with this simplest
Tee, It's a classic, pure simplicity
Turn it around and on the
Back, it's also printed, see?
It's a staple of any merch store
And I've researched four!
But not exactly what I'd wear
When Nan would visit me
Oh no, you'll want something formal
Something subtler like a polo
A fancy shirt without the fussy cuff stuff
And you'll see that we've employed
Some pretty neat embroiderys
So if your Nan is visiting
The needlework will stun her
Or perhaps you want some merch that shows
The logo more than polos will?
Oho! Well! Meet the shirt I
Call 'All over Overkill!'
Near 200 faces on!
(And I should know, I placed them on)
If you want dedication then here's the
One that fit's the bill

Would you like to by my merchandise?
It's rather nice
In a range of size for a decent price

It's my merchandise, it's rather nice!
So improve your life
For low, low price of my merch

Buy my merchandise! It's rather nice
In a range of size for a decent price

It's my merchandise, it's rather nice
So improve your life
For low, low price of my merch

But there's more left to see!
No, don't forget accessories!
So don't go yet because I
Bet you'll impressed with these
It's seems a mug's another
Tuber merchandise necessity
But black mug weren't an opinion so
I opted for this emblem, see?
To cap it off we've hats of
Course to slap of your noggin
Need a snapback for your hat rack?
Well perhaps the one I'm stocking?
I was honestly ecstatic that
They manufactured orange
And there's a logo on the back so
You've a stack of jaunty options
See initially
I wasn't even gonna do a beanie
But then everybody told me they
Would rather have a beanie
But instead of going back upon
The cap I just completed
I just went and did a beanie as well

Would you like to by my merchandise?
It's rather nice
In a range of size for a decent price

It's my merchandise, it's rather nice!
So improve your life
For low, low price of my merch

Would you like to by my merchandise?
And every second it's not selling
A person dies!
It's my merchandise, it's rather nice!
So save a life
For low, low price of my merch

I hear you typing
Griping 'Stupes is just a sell out!'
Well these are made to order so
They oughta' never sell out!
Making videos can be expensive
Get the hell out!
Spent a hundred quid on boxes just
To flesh this flipping set out!
They're all in one theme but
They're all really comfy
And if you buy enough then maybe
I can buy a Humvee
Maybe it could fund me to see another country
But whilst you're sat at home know
That you'll be looking lovely
In Stupendium undies
Socks and crocs and dungarees
Cuddly plush toys, sun umbrellas and a onesie
Though in honesty the profit's
Aren't much - these
Might help me make my videos
A little more than monthly
I want to thank you all
For all of the support, it's awesome
Pouring out on every morsel I've recorded
But if we hit December and
Nobody went and bought it
At least my family members have
Their Christmas presents sorted
Would you like to buy my merchandise?

Uhmm, Not really something i
Could see myself buying

Oh ok I'm sorry-

Would you like to buy my merchandise?

Yeah, this is the best
Merch I've ever bought

Seventeen holy shi

I love stupendium merchandise and that
Is my genuine opinion

I wholeheartedly endorse this product and
Or products

Click the link to buy my merchandise!
You know you want to buy my merchandise
Oh and if you haven't yet, hit subscribe!
Come on, buy my merch please

(Ah no pressure though seriously)