Cast of Galavant, Joshua Sasse - Jackass in a Can lyrics

Your average knight in armor
He's utterly the pit's

His ego's so humungous
His helmet barely fit's

He wears two tons of padding and
Thinks he's quite the man

He's nothing but a jackass in
A fancy metal can

A jackass in a can
There's nothing worser than
Some high and mighty jackass in a can
(All spit in their cups)

(spoken) my master hasn't had a sip of his
Port without my spit in it in
Years i got him cravin' it now i
Gave him two months without it
He said it didn't taste right

(spoken) so, what about your knight? Is
He as bad as ours?

(spoken) uh, yeah, sure
(sung) there's all that fame and glory

The smell, though? Not so great

And then those big, long lances

Yeah, to overcompensate

The glamor and swagger

Yeah, I'm not really a fan

He's quite -

A major dillweed?

In a fancy metal can

A dillweed in a can
There's nothing lamer than
A condescending dillweed in a can

And who does all the planning

Yeah, and who does all the work

True

Who gets no vacation

Not one pay raise, not one perk

Good point

Whose third rate insurance comes
Without a dental plan

Your average, humble squire

And not the meathead in the can
That jerkface in a can
There's nothing sadder than

Some over muscled, chauvinistic
Self indulgent, egotistic
Stingy, prissy, narcississy

Jackass in a can!

(spoken) oh, my God that's me