Cast of Galavant, Darren Evans, Vinnie Jones, Timothy Omundson - Manlyology lyrics

(spoken)
Whoa! This is amazing! What's that smell?

Testosterone

M-m-m-m, musky

If you want your wife to respect you
 you have to earn her respect you
Need to man up

But how?

It just so happens you're talking
To a professor of the art of manhood lesson
One: Historical background

(sung) way back in the ancient ocean
Live a flabby, pitiful thing
It was soft and pale neither female or male
Rather like you, my king

This creature was lacking a backbone
It couldn't stand tall and free
'Til it grew a spine and a pair like mine
And evolved into well, me

Now frankly, this could take you
A good ten million year
Me, I know a shortcut
May I have some volunteers?

(spoken) he's looking at me, isn't he?

(sung) throw back your shoulders
Suck in that gut seize the advantage
And kick some butt do watcha want
And do it violently
That'sthe secret of manlyology

(spoken) any questions?

(spoken) will there be a quiz?

(spoken) no, moving on lesson two:
Theory and Application

(sung) now, manhood's pretty simple
It's a display of relative might
Men give commands and eat with their hands

Leave the toilet seat up?

Damn right does a man ever order a spritzer?

No!

Does a man wear sandals with socks?

No?

Does he own a cat?

Yes!

Sure about that?

Um

Does he think about miniature rocks?

Pass!

Does a man mind blood in his mustache?

What?

Does he care if he smells like arse?

Whose?

Does he pick his nose?

Eww

Bros before hoes?

Duh!

Close enough you pass

By George, I think I've got it!

Well, we'll get you up to speed

Maybe a private lesson?

Guess I volunteer

No need

Kick into action and crack that whip
Crush all emotion and one last tip
Don't miss your yearly colonoscopy
That's the secret of manlyology

(spoken)
Oh Gareth! I can't thank you enough!
Tomorrow night I shall dine
With Madelena i will show her
All I've learned come here, you!

(spoken) oi! I've only hugged one man in
My life it was the
Day my father died i squeezed
That rotten bastard to death

(spoken) right we'll hug later good talk

(spoken) yeah