Tim Minchin - If I Didn't Have You lyrics

Yeah, yeah if I didn't have you yeah

If I didn't have you to hold me tight
(If I didn't have you)
If I didn't have you to lie with at night
(When I'm feeling blue)
If I didn't have you to share my sighs
(Share my sighs)
And to kiss me and dry my tears when I cry
Well I really think that I would
Have somebody else

(If I didn't have you) if I didn't have you
Someone else would do

Your love is one in a million
(One in a million)
You couldn't buy it at any price
(Can't buy love) but of the
Nine-point-nine-nine-nine hundred-thousand
Other possible loves


Statistically, some of them would
Be equally nice (Equally nice)

Or maybe not as nice but, say
Smarter than you or dumber but better at
Sport or fucking tracing?

I'm just saying i really think that I would
Probably have somebody else
(If I didn't have you)
If I didn't have you someone else would do
(Someone else would surely do)
If I were a rich man
Fiddle diddle diddle diddle diddle
Diddle diddle dee
I guess I would be with a surgeon or a model
Or a rellie of the royals or a Kennedy
Or a nymphomaniacal exhibitionist heiress
To a large chain of hotels

If I were a rich man, maybe I would fiddle
Fiddle diddle diddle with the rich man girls

I'm not saying that I'd not love you
If I was wealthy or handsome
But realistically
There's lots of fish in the sea
And if I had a different rod
I would conceivably land some

Even though I am
Fiscally consistently pitiable
And considerably less 'Brad Pitt'
Than 'Brad pitiful'
Am I really so poor and ugly that you think
Only you could possibly love me?

And I really think that I would
Probably have somebody else

(If I didn't have you)
If I didn't have you someone else would do
(Someone else would surely do)
Look, I'm not undervaluing what we've
Got when I say
That, given the role chaos inevitably plays
In the inherently flawed notion of fate

It's abstruse to deduce that
I found my soulmate at the age of 17
It's just mathematically unlikely that at
A university in Perth
I happened to stumble on the
One girl on Earth
Specifically designed for me

And if I may conjecture a further objection
Love is nothing to do
With destined perfection
The connection is strengthened
The affection simply grows over time

Like a flower or a mushroom
Or a guinea pig or a vine
Or a sponge or bigotry or a banana

And love is made more powerful
By the ongoing drama of shared experience
And the synergy of a
Kind of symbiotic empathy, or something

So I trust it would go without saying
That I would feel really very sad
If tomorrow you were to
Fall off something high
Or catch something bad but, I'm just saying
I don't think you're special
I mean, I think you're special
But, you fall within a bell curve

I mean, I'm just saying I
Really think that I would probably
Have somebody else

I think you are unique and beautiful
You make me happy just by being around
(Just being around)
But objectively you would have to agree
That baby when I found you
Options were relatively thin on the ground
(Thin on the ground)
You're lovely but there must be
Girls as lovely as you
Or maybe more open to spanking
Or table tennis

I'm just saying that I think that I would
Probably have somebody else

I mean I reckon it's pretty
Likely that if for example
My first girlfriend, Jackie, hadn't dumped me
After I kissed Winston's ex-girlfriend Neah
At Steph's party back in 1993

Enough variables would probably
Have been altered
By the absence of that event
To have meant the advent
Of a tangential narrative in
Which we don't meet

Which is to say there exists a theoretical
Hypothetical parallel life
Where what is is not as it is
And I am not your husband and
You are not my wife

And I am a stuntman living in LA
Married to a small blonde Portuguese skier
Who when she's not training
Does abstract painting practises yoga
And brews her own beer

And really likes making home movies
And suffers neck down alopecia

But with all my heart and all my mind
I know one thing is true
I have just one life and just one love
And my love, that love is you
And if it wasn't for you darling, you
I really think that I would possibly
Have somebody else

If I didn't have you if I didn't have you
Someone else would do
Someone else would surely do