Tim Minchin, Gabriel Ebert, Lesli Margherita & Phillip Spaeth, John Arthur Greene, Original Broadway Cast of Matilda - Miracle, Pt. 2 lyrics

A baby
Mrs Wormwood a child the most precious
Gift the natural world can
Bestow upon us has been handed
To you a brand new

Human being! A life a person a
Wonderful new person is about to
Come into your life to bring
Love, and magic, and happiness, and wonder!

Oh, bloody hell!

Every life I bring into this world
Restores my faith in human kind

Push, Mrs Wormwood, push!

I'll push you in a minute!

Each newborn life a canvas yet unpainted
This still, unbroken skin
This uncorrupted mind

Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely
The chances of existence
Almost infinitely small

The most common thing in life is life
And yet every single life every new life
Is a miracle! Miracle!

Where is he? Where's my son?

Mr Wormwood! Are you smoking a cigarette?

What? Oh, of course i'm sorry
Doctor what am I thinking?
This calls for a proper smoke oh, my word
He's an ugly little thing

This is one of the most
Beautiful children I've ever seen

Oh, my good Lord where's his fingie?

His what?

His fingie his whatchamacallit his doo dah
What've you done with his fingie?

This child doesn't have a "thingie" –

What? A boy with no fingie?
Look what you've done
You stupid woman this boy's got no fingie!

Mr Wormwood! This child is
A girl a beautiful, beautiful little girl

Is there still time for the
Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur
Sausage –

Dance competition's finished you
Missed it look, I don't
Suppose we could exchange it for a boy
Could we?

This is the worst day of my life!