Punky Brüster - Heinous Anus lyrics

10 am, and I hit the alarm
It's been 5 short hours since I tied one on
And on the way to the
Kitchen for my morning cup
I gotta run to the can before my bowels erupt

Grab my knees and howl like a dawg
I've got a 12 inch long jalapeño log
You can keep that Thai
Yeah I think I'll pass
I ain't got a week to nurse my ass!

I just want a normal stool!
Hey, hey hey heinous anus!
I've been on the throne all day
I can't face the world in any other way
Help me out i wanna be someone who
Doesn't start the morning with a molten poo!

I don't want this screaming hoop!
Hey, hey hey heinous anus!

'Haaa groupies! love 'em or leave 'em well
Doctor Skinny has never loved
'em, but he sure as hell wouldn't
Mind givin' in a shot, the
Only problem being
He hasn't got quite used to
The whole punk-rock female
Thing, but "hey", he says, "if there's
A ring through a nose
Then she's metal enough for me"

Oh my god oh my god it's you! -Hi
You're the guy from Punky Bruster band! Yeah
Oh, this is too wow
This is crazy! My friends are going to freak!
-Of course I'm a big star
I've gotta phone my friends can I
Come in and use your phone?
-Hey hey sure, sweetheart!'