Byron Henderson - THE JUDAS CONTRACT. (DEMO) lyrics

Hope you find what you're looking for
Hope it’s worth it
Marina used to say it's me or her
But that was rooted deep beneath the surface
Now I'm serving life and suicide is flirting
Made so many promises many, many promises
I’m in a different war, fighting trauma
Mentally, I'm all out going all out, hey
Hope you find what you're looking for
Hope it's worth it
Marina used to say it's me or her
But that was rooted deep beneath the surface
Now I'm serving life and suicide is flirting
Made so many promises many, many promises
I'm in a war and
It's all over consciousness
Psychically, all out going all out, whoa

God taketh away and God giveth
I dеfy the odds by digging
Graves for the odds living
Thеy minimize lives if they weren’t
Made in their God’s image
I won't apologize
Even if it’s their pride I offended set back
Murdered, I heard lies of
Demons that crept back submerged in darkness
Never had a choice in making my own bed
Fore you turned it to a coffin
Glimmers of light, nah
I don't see them often
Still I'm reminiscing on every minute
I'm missing out on you
Don’t want you to feel resentment
Or neglect towards me, Please
Rest assure
I'm well aware of what the cost will be
Murder victims doing somersaults
For the green, clean over counters
Best believe some will vault
Pedophilic rings linked to some occult
If I'm home to you and you're home to me
Then I'm home to two

Where all my demons at
I hear them screaming
And sometimes I get to screaming back
Only have two friends that
I've been needing bad
I know you may not understand
But I'm at peace with that
Y'all content just watching all
These kids die
Y'all content if it means in the end
I bleed
Won't pretend I care if you apologize
If you ain't them
You can't tell me anything
Lost souls all around got you polarized
Had enough of giving y'all my energy
Been trapped so long
Couldn't tell a lie apart from the truth
Or a friend from an enemy
I know y'all can't wait just to see me die
But the joke ain't on you, you're the joke
Even if I lose it all, in death
I get to breathe

F these drugs, the money
And clubs they fiend for (whoa)
F my life and all those slugs they scream for
(whoa) all your wars, your flag
Your anthem all that (whoa)
God missed all my calls
Chose not to call back (whoa)
I know all my flaws, I know all my wrongs
I don't seek forgiveness
Know when to fall back
Won't be lost much longer
Told you rent's due
Mindset is death and trauma, all that
I don't have enough time left to resent you
Thoughts rather vindictive
No walls surround me, death came knocking
I don't know love, and I don't know me
Got to know darkness, got to know sleep
Losing my balance, off of my feet
I don't know Kels and I don't know Lee
But I hear desperation all in y'all screams
Got to know fortune, got to know peace
I don't know fate, I don't know greed
I don't know vengefulness or know hate
Got to know faith, got to know peaks
I don't know pain and I don't know weight
I just know I've been gone for too long
Lost myself more and more through mistakes
Failed escape routes had death come for me
Till I heard two voices tell me, "Breathe"

Been the light in the darkest of places
All I'm left with are blood soaked hands
All this just to keep theirs clean
That's ironic
Monkey wrenches thrown in all y'all plans
Kelsey told me if I die, we die together
Like F it, let's fight
Marina said screw your ups and downs
When it's all said and done
You just better make sure that you left right
So I've been making sure they
Know I love them
Even if it's for the last time
Depth of my conviction kept me
Here although it's past time
Trauma got me blacking
Coming back, ain't know what happened
They said I put forth an action that
Was colder than my last rhyme, Uh
Jumping over borders
Ain't no police to report it
I've been dead to the world
I'm residing where the morgue is
Hand in hand with death's shadow
Dark room full of screams
Kels standing with Aaliyah, both
Saying don't leave, Whoa
Okay, so I complain less
But they'll be traumatized so my
Death will never be painless
More memories stained with death and misery
Shame that I've got to go to change
And memorize what my aim is
That fall is dangerous
I hear y'all calling
But for now you're nameless
If I was flawless
Then we wouldn't be friends
I feel y'all clawing just to keep me here
But still I'm falling
So in these last moments
Fingers crossed no love is lost
Less about me, more about my love for y'all
Going off the deep end, they say
Nothing worth more to me though, AK
So Kels, tell Aaliyah bout the real me
Remember only you can
Tell her how they killed me
America is heartless
But strength, from y'all I draw it
And formerly submerged
I emerge from the darkness
Though I never found hope
Y'all never lost it

Though there's strength in my every step
The wounds they dealt to my spirit
Will never heal if I stay
Here though there's courage in
My every breath, I fight
With no hope i fight for you, you
And you don't let me go