King of the Dot, Dumbfoundead, Dizaster - Dizaster vs. Dumbfoundead lyrics

First off, why the guy that valet
Cars dressed like Avatar?
Ten years ago we battle at a
Record store called "The Basement"
Ten years later you battled
Cassidy in a basement
What a whole lot of life wasted
While I was doing acting
Stand-up and music as well
You were watching 8 Mile
Everyday mastering losing yourself
You probably think I'mma call you
Something like a cab driver
That's stupid as hell, it's 2015
You drive an Uber XL
I remember when Daylyt was on
The same team with you
Then he got a mask tattoo on his face cause
He didn't want to be seen with you
He was embarrassed that you
Were from his clique embarrassed!
This is the dude who took a public shit
And told Diddy he would suck his dick
Shots fired, shots fired
I don't know when you and
His friendship got sour
Was it when things got rough and
You disappeared like a soft coward?
Or was it when his career charged
Up while yours lost power?
Or maybe is when you tried to crash
A plane into the Watts Tower?
Either way, that's your marital dispute
Not ours
So handle that shit on your off hours
Or dance in the ring you wallflowers
You're not from LA, I rep the city proper
Clippers, Lakers, Dodgers
You're from Ventura County
Dentists, lawyers, doctors
Actually, you're from Thousand Oaks
A big backyard with a thousand goats
Cows and sheep
Where you make wallets, wallets, wallets
Towels and coats
You're not a drug dealer, you're a cow dealer
I could summarize your life without filler
In grade school, he was an outfielder
In high school, this jerk worked as a
Clerk at Turban Outfitters
No pictures with girls
He missed going to Prom
Too busy rolling with his rich gang
His nickname was Rich Homie Quran
A young thug looking for a bone to pick
While I was getting stoned with chicks
He was trying to throw stones at chicks
Holy shit! But he did go to college
Majored in multisyllabics
Minored in calling people faggots
Took some theater classes that's
Why he's overly dramatic
Graduation pictures receiving diplomas
From Bin Laden when you were a kid
You always got Air Jordans
Actually you're the heir to the
Airline that flies to Jordan, air Jordan

For this battle I traveled all the way
From the land of the rising sun
Where, instead of an alarm clock
His father woke me up
Every morning by banging
On the side of a giant drum
So we walked into the front yard and stood
Together and aligned and
Synchronized our hums
They taught us the true story
Of how life begun but, instead of a Bible
We were reading scriptures straight
Out from the
Book version of Street Fighter 1
And I'm not gonna lie y'all
It was kind of fun
Everybody give it up for my battle contender
His name is Dumbfoundead but
He's also known as
Hannibal Lecter when he's at
The animal shelter
As far as your nail salons
I'm through with you
I'm sick of taking my mother there
And having your mother talk
Shit about it in Korean when
She polish the cuticle
Looking over to her co-worker like
Dizaster makes up Korean
And I'm like, "What does that mean?"
And she's like "Ohoho we say
That your mama she beautiful"
I don't give a fuck if you
Guys think that I'm racist
I'm about to make an Asian dude open
Up the doors for me like
The Keymaker from the Matrix
Congratulations, Ninja Gaiden
Your fake fight got millions of page hit's
As soon as your shit went viral online, you
Called up your sensei and told him "Ninja
We made it!" (Stop my time bro)
And you been living off that
Prank since and that's people
Are all pissed but how could you blame him
He's Asian, it's in his nature to try to rip
People off with their fake kicks
Before this battle he told Organik "If the
Battle go for over three minutes
The battle isn't gonna go down"
Looking like the faggot ass kid
From Indiana Jones which
Makes sense why you want such a Short Round
(oh yes, short round)
I don't even need race jokes
I don't need race jokes
I could demolish you with facts
The only reason King of the Dot didn't
Need Avi to book this match
Cause you starving and you want
This just as bad you make songs but you're
Always getting taxed
And you back to where you first started
Cause it's the only place where you can spit
It and keep every dollar that you have
Ain't no respect and honor for a cat
Who walked around and turned his back
On the same art form that
Got him where he's at
You figure after all the acupuncture
You'd have a spinal column in your back
But is probably not attached cause you
Went to Hollywood to act
And on top of all of that
Your biggest accomplishment in rap
Is paying to get Waka Faka on a track
Listen, so tell me who's better
The facts very-very clear
He's like Bruce Jenner
You have a transparent career
And that's why I do race jokes
Cause no one cares for your life
They want to hear stereotypes
You're such a racist Asian guy
Your favorite football player is
Probably Jerry Rice
Yo, look at your fucking moon shaped
Lucy Liu face your dick is like a half-used
Tube of tooth paste
You got a tooth ache cause
You went Ruby Tuesdays
And ordered the Scooby Doo plate
Don't get it twisted y'all
He's with this drama
Oh yeah Jin Kazama his mama
Is with this drama
As soon as he touched to Toronto
Six Chihuahuas went missing in Mississauga
Wonder why Asian people don't got love for us
It's cause we always treat
Them like dumb tourists
And every time they try to
Stand up for themselves
They get beat the fuck up by Chuck Norris
I see Organik want to cut me
Off and end the battle
That's cool, you cut me off fine
Cause no matter how much you
Try shorten my rounds
You're mother will always love me long time

You made your whole career out
Off calling yourself a terrorist
Like is anybody scared of him?
Let me give you comparisons of your
Usual terrorist and delusional American
They throw rocks at tanks
You like rocking tanks
They blew up the New York skyline
You blow up my timeline
They create a hostage situation
You couldn't handle a Caustic situation
You're just a spoiled prince of Arabia
Appropriating terrorist culture, Iggy Azralea
After that incident with Math
He had to battle overseas
Like an athlete with bad knees
I saw that battle with that Swiss
Guy they gave you mad cheese
In Amsterdam they paid you in hashish
He went from Ukraine to Spain
Just this last week damn chief
You'll battle in any international backstreet
For a flat fee
You're like the real life Zangief
But the wack thing, he wasn't even on tour
He was just being a tourist
Backpacking through Europe for the
Backpackers in Europe
You went from King of the Dot to King Of Iraq
You went from cream of the
Crop to screaming "Marak"
But, I did see that rap battle
Where you spoke in Arabic
Was that Lebanon or Qatar?
I couldn't tell if he was battling with bars
Or haggaling at a bazaar
Yo that shit was weak bro
Have you all seen his fucking Tweets
He was like "Come to my thirtieth birthday
You will hear gun bars
Personals and the nerdiest wordplay
It's gonna be at a mansion
We'll have drinks and battles
Let's kick it! Everything you
Can imagine" except bitches

But just to research this battle
I went to go and observe
Pulled up to curb at his home in the 'burbs
I saw the Prince of Sadi coming
Out of a tinted Cadi'
That was your homie for sure
And then from a distance I saw three wise men
Bearing gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh
And as I got closer I
Realised it was just Rone
Illmaculate and Eurgh
That shit was crazy though
The party was wild though
He had a petting zoo and a patio, all camels
He had a clown making balloon animals
All camels he even had kids hitting piñatas
That were shaped like the Twin
Towers and a little Obama
And he brought out even a stripper from Gaza
She was showing her wrists and ankles
And did a split on the llamas
But the weird thing was
They're throwing rocks at her instead
Of tipping her dollars

You said some shit about Jafar
Some shit about Obama
Call me all this shit about
Camels and shit about llamas
I'd expected more from you
Some terrorist shit about martyrs
It's 2015 little guy
You got a chink in your armor
Listen here dumpling breath
Your mother's flatter than a fucking desk
Getting breast-fed as a baby
You must've been stressed
Your milk was gone after a couple pecks
You went "mtsou
Mtsou" and there was nothing left
See I can do what you do
Hit the people with the comedian feel
But fuck that
They wanted to see a blood bath
Let the the dim sum spill
Your bitch gonna leave here
Knowing how getting fistfucked
With a pair of her own nunchuks feels
He was raised in Hip-Hop
Growing up your favorite
Three rappers of all time were Lil' Kim
BIG and Rakim Jung Ill
You know what else rhymes with Kim Jung Ill?
You have way too many family
Members in Richmond Hill
Live in front of everybody
They gon' say this kid got killed
But of course they gonna say he
Served me over the net
Every Asian was born with
Incredible ping-pong skills
I'll admit y'all, I got a heavy Asian fetish
So before we go any further I'mma put the
Cards all out on the table tennis
Your mother is a masseuse from Brampton
Who specializes in massage and feng shui
I never book her cause she's really a hooker
And that kind of rubs the wrong way
Your bitch is a fucking anime dominatrix slut
She came to our temple and got
Raped by a hundred monks
While she was getting punched in
The face with uppercuts
Cause that's the only way she can bust a nut
You can't make her cum Dumb
You should just give up
You done after a quick thrust
When Dumb hit's once
It's like getting fist-fucked by a kid
Giving her a single fist-pump
His bitch calls it "the one inch punch"
You better not talk about the
Math fight at all
Cause, I guarantee you that's
One math problem
Your nerdy ass would never like to solve
Me and you fighting is like throwing a
Little nine year-old in pike brawl
One right and fall, go nighty-nighty
The right hand is like Tylenol
I'll doggystyle your mama on top of
The China Wall and then put
My sushi roll in her booty hole
Because she likes it raw
Yo I'll leave this china doll
With a wired jaw
I'll strike him with the eye of
The tiger plus a lion paw
I'll fucking throw a shuriken star on
You out a moving car
And then drag you by with a iron claw
You ain't the type of Asian guy
To throw a giant fireball
You're the type of Asian guy
That I would call if I needed help trying
To install my firewall he had a Firefox
She says "I'm a Mac now cause I evolved"
And he ain't in her lap now
Because his dick caught a
Virus and is microsoft
With your little eye sockets that
Look like dime slots
It'd be a wild shot to squeeze an
Eye drop in the right spot
Without mirrors coming out the back
Of your head from
Both sides to help you see your blind spots
You're a fucking yellow minion
With a single eyeball
A fucking North Korean cyclops
That shouldn't be allowed to
Leave the sidewalk
Without a seeing guide dog
And a translator that speaks his dialogue
Eat a dick!
You little faggot trying to distract
Me through my shit
Shut up you fucking little bitch
Your faggot ass should be quiet
Weren't you were one of my students
I'd taught how to be a master at silence!

(I didn't say word you taught
How to be silent sensei
- I will Kung-Fu kick you)
Yo Diz I heard you finally put out an album
Bet that shit is mad wack
Let's see how many damn tracks
Of course no surround wrap
Parental Advisory, it may contain anthrax
(What the fuck)?
(Diz: That's okay that's okay i allow that)

Nah I'm playing, I'm playing
I bump that shit on the road
I especially like track number 4
Where the hook goes:
"Rolling through Egypt with my bros"
Wait, Lush is your manager right?
(That was already a punchline)
How the fuck do you have a
Manager that can't manage his life?
You take financial advice from a guy
Who can't pay his battlers right
But always has a bag of that white
(god damn! that's fucked up man)
With all that fucking crust around
Your nose you look thirsty
I know years ago you ordered Jin
But for me it take one shot
To kill a Wild Turkey
Yours bars tender career is on the rocks
So how can your old fashion style hurt me
You rap like it's last call trynna take
The bar out in a hurry
(Can I get a little something here?)
I couldn't write like how Diz writes I
Like to keep my shit tight
Let me give you an insight on
What people like and dislike
You put all this extra
Shit before your punches
And it don't hit right
Like your last fist-fight
It's simple math, listen class
Let me teach you all about one liners
Speaking about one liners
Is that an eyebrow or a sun visor?
See? That was a sample
I'm the nicest, you're from ISIS
There's another example
You're full of yourself and awful
You're falafel there is another example
When Organik was forced to ban
You from the sport
He had other battle leagues support
And we all saw increases on the annual report
We saw Youtube views going up 20 percent
Female attendance a 110
Chicks were actually asking
About upcoming events
And even Ovo and Drizzy wanted to spent
But, you?
You watched Blackout on Pay Per View
Invited all his closest friends
And neighbors through
Put the TV on a homemade stage for two
And yelled multis at the screen
Till his face turned blue
And none of us could rebuttal
We were placed on mute
I can't believe you actually
Wanted unlimited verses
I thought 2 minutes was perfect
For a limited person i even created an
Interesting fictional version
All that extra shit you do
Is a just a diversion
All that twisting and turning
Hippity-pippity
Like middle eastern sprinkle bursting
I know when we first met we were just teens
And right now you think we doing big things
But ten years from now I'll
Be in the big screen
And you're going to be here
In World Domination 15

Game over you talking about my eyebrows
But you're a man
Why you even looking there and
Why would you care? I know
I know why you angry my face is bushy there
It reminds your Asian bitches pussy hair
(of course it does)

Yeah of course you saw that but you
Can't see anything else in life
You know what rhymes with Dumbfoundead?
You're so Asian your face looks
Like a fucking plug outlet
If you're looking for the full package in him
No, he ain't about shit cause
Judging by the shape of
His eyes you could tell he's
Never been well rounded
He spends all his monthly allowance on
Kung Lao outfit's and Kung Pao shrimp
He's a B-boy with a new dance move he's
About to start busting out with it
It's called the "left-right-up
Down-punch-punch ground kick"
I went to your father's convenience store
To get some 40 ounces and
I didn't have some cash
I told him "Give me the bottle MrMing
I'll get you back"
He's like "Oh, no, we don't do that"
I was like "Why?"
He's like "Every time you take it
A dollar you don't come back" i'm funny dog
At least I didn't give
You some fucking cliché
Shit like the Asian guy from Hangover
Or call you a chain smoker that plays
Poker or is probably a game coder
Or probably that your mother is a pale
Hoe and it's a shame on her
That after she built the railroad
We ran a train on her
That's a case closed, the game over
'Long blade tucked under the
Raincoat' mind state
Like J-Hova when he created "Takeover"
I'll shank you in your nose
With a coat hanger
Then pull your face closer
Hit from close range, from the flamethrower
Break you
Throw hay makers and break shoulders
One shot all you saw was his head come
Off like a ISIS Islamic state soldier
You don't deserve punchlines
You deserve "stuff like this"
You deserve to be treated like
A little ass bitch
I deserve to fucking beat the shit
Out of you and your homies
I'll fucking kill them all
I'll have my homie fucking hook up an atomic
Bomb and drop it on the Pacific Mall
So stick to playing your part and crashing
Every car race that you start
I can tell you Korean by
The way that you park i guarantee you
Even though he was Caucasian Paul Walker
Was really Asian at heart
You little fucking bike commuter
You spineless, rice consuming, science tutor
Fucking online cyber shooter, online computer
Cyber shooter, high school loser
The fucking sheltered private schooler
Went on and become a
Knock-off diamond jeweler
Driving Scion hybrid Ubers
With nitrous boosters

Yo your father was a fucking
Listen to me you little faggot

Your father was a violent child abuser
Everyday he made you fight Akuma
And if you lose you couldn't
Have no spicy tuna
Your wife looks like HAYABUSA
And she designed my Pumas
And the only reason you could afford
To get those clothes and kicks
Is cause some homeless orphaned kids
On their opening morning shifts
In Mongolia stitched your retro Jordan six
For like 40 cents
Did you get my Tokyo Drift?
You 4 foot 6 Margaret Cho
Looking Yoko Ono bitch?
You ain't gon' show guns
You're a Shogun chef
I'll fistfuck your bitch with a shinobi fist
And you won't do shit
Cause your go-go gadget is a
4 foot GoPro stick
And next time (stand back bro)
Next time you want to do some
Fake shit to get some
Views I'mma show you what some
Real training will do one shot, two shot
Bitch I'm more Asian than you!