The Stupendium, Shwabadi, Freshy Kanal - Loki vs Count Olaf lyrics

Rap Battle! Loki!
Vs count Olaf!
Begin!

Oh then, you're surely joking
You must be the reason
Odin still hasn't awoken
Your whole broken series of prose
Must've bored him to tears from the open
Put the Baudelaire's chosen heirs in
Woes for their fortune
Yet Poe tends to be more potent
Look away, or the bitter, grumpier Mr tumnus
Will pluck your eye out with his goat chin
(Ha) long ago, you lusted over the stage
Your drеams were crushed bеcause
You skipped leg day
Watch the God of tricks Ragna-rock a diss
Like Violet's signature
You're left not dominant
Are you close friends with Heimdall?


'Cuz that nose bridges the nine realms!
So many flaws like a hotel
If only your folks had raised you
Better than you raise that eyebrow
As a villain you are so trivial
It's outrageous i influenced millions to bow
Down and make way you're insignificant
Ridiculed by children without safety
Tried pilfering riches but ended
Up Klaus chasing!
Marvel's undebated talking film adaptations
You placed in a railroad scene
It was so much of a trainwreck!
I’m shapeshifting, you're out of shape
Shifty!
When this snake's bit ya like your dad
You'll have holes in your pale neck!
I doubt this sleazy creep could even read
Of the evil deeds I’ve been completing
This mortal being ought to steal
Some mischief from me, please!
Even if you look me up
You'll still be beneath me!


What was that sloppy verse?
I wanted roast beef, dammit!
So call me the Hulk
This rap is low-key slappin'! (Slappin')
Out of both of Odin's sons
You're the only one
Looking like an Avatar carcass! (James)
When fighting fire with an arsonist
You better keep your ass guarded! (Flames)
Oh man, your whole plan got out of hand
That's so sad!
I’m Olaf, but this dope dropped
Off the bridge like "Bye
Frosty the Snowman!"
Your bro's the GOAT of gods
You're the god of goats
If you swallowed your pride
You would probably choke
I don't got that hocus pocus
Or that mind control
But still keep my staff under my control
You're so horny, but I get it, dude
Your whole family tree's a
Fucking petting zoo
Heard your pregnancy was violent
Not surprised your poor privates are blue
Remind me not to go horse riding with you!
Of course
I’m more striking than Thor's lightning
My author could better Handler
Task of writing adored
Ideas than the broad psyche of norse
Vikings who thought: "Right! What
If a court jester had horns
That were all spiky?"
Is it just me, or is it melting in here?
Somebody toss me water
After all, I’m still parched-

-From thirsting over my foster daughter


What? No!

You met Kit Snicket and she thought
You were a fun guy being with you killed her
Harder than the fungi
Then you had a girlfriend
But she wasn't down for the Count
Once she was in, you had to opt out!
I see through your acts and
The threats you excrete
A count more fabricated
Than Sesame Street's!
Take this scepter beneath your
Chest ending your spiel!
I’m not talking Patrick Harris when
I get you to kneel!

Now Count Olaf has just been burned
A word here which means personally hurt by
The deep meanings in Loki's "quick quips"
However, when you are as blindsided as Olaf
You might not know when to-

Quit the talk! Compared to my seas
Yer threat's pale!
Yer directors never let your
Story arc set sail!

I study snake biology, not mental health
But with that family drama
You should get help


After Thor's image fleeted
I needed a kiwi to save
My series of unfortunate screenings
And I thought I could be loved
By my father and Thor, but no!

For you, that's not how the story goes!
Funny how balance is your boss' schtick
Yet he left your neck in bit's
Before you got a split
Your birth family left you to
Melt like a frost kid
Gave you the cold shoulder
Odin had to let ya hop kins!
Asgard died and your lives were disrupted
No VFD could save it's Very Fiery Destruction
Go drown your shame in your bar with no doors
'Cuz I’ve taken advantage of
Another spoiled orphan!

Who won? Who’s next?
You decide!
The next Rap Battle is on the way!